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all right with me. This is a free country, and no one proposes to dictate one’s private life. However, I would appreciate it if you would do me the honor of not burdening my already overtaxed mind with such patent nonsense.
    Otherwise, your work with the tabulations has been most excellent; I am enclosing a cheque for £ 20 to cover your work so far.

    Sincerely,
    Edward Ballister-ffoulkes, Bart..

    12 February 1667
    Cambridge

    My dear Newton:
    You have stretched the bonds of friendship too far. You have presumed upon me as a friend, and have quite evidently forgotten my position as head of the Department of Mathematics at this College.
    The harsh language in which you have presumed to address me is too shocking for any self-respecting man to bear, and I, for one, refuse to accept such language from my social inferiors. As a Professor of Mathematics in one of the most ancient of universities. I will not allow myself or my position to be ridiculed by a young jackanapes who has no respect for those in authority or for his elders.
    Your childish twaddle about glass prisms producing rainbows—a fact which any schoolboy knows—is bad enough; but to say that I am such a fool that I would refuse to recognize “one of the most important advances in mathematics” is beyond the pale of social intercourse.
    Repeatedly during the last few months, you have attempted to foist off on me and others implausible and unscientific theories which have no basis whatever in fact and which no reputable scientist would be foolish enough to endorse. You are not a mathematician, sir; you are a charlatan and a mountebank!
    You have no data; you admit working from “intuition” and hypotheses cut out of whole cloth; you cannot and will not give any reliable authority for ay of your statements, nor will you accept the reliable statements of better men than yourself.
    This unseemly behavior forces me to exercise my prerogative and my authority in defence of the college and the university. I shall recommend to the authorities that you be effused readmission.

    Isaac Barrow, Ph.D.
    Department of
    Mathematics
    Trinity College

    16 February 1667

    FROM: Ballistics Research Department, Army Artillery
    TO: Mr. Isaac Newton, A.B., Woolsthorpe
    SUBJECT: Reduction in personnel
    ENCLOSURE: Cheque for 2/10s/6d

    1. In view of the increased personality friction between yourself and certain members of this department, this department feels that it would be to our mutual disadvantage to continue retaining your services as mathematical consultant.
    2. As of 16 February 1667 your employment is hereby terminated.

    3. Enclosed is a cheque covering your services from 8 February 1667 to date.

    By order of the Commanding General
    Major Rupert Knowles,
    Adjutant for General Sir Edward Ballister-ffoulkes

    12 March 1667
    Whitehall

    My dear fellow,
    I am making this communication quite informal because of your equally informal method of—shall we say—getting my ear.
    I have been nagged at day and night for the past three weeks by a certain lady of our mutual acquaintance; she wants me to “do something for that nice young Mr. Newton.” She seems to think you are a man of some intelligence, so, more in order to stop her nagging tongue than anything else, I have personally investigated the circumstances of your set-to with the Ballistics Research Department.
    I have spoken with General B-f, and looked over all the correspondence. Can’t make head or tail of what you’re talking about, myself, but that’s beside the point. I did notice that your language toward the general became somewhat acid toward the last. Can’t actually say I blame you; the military mind can get a bit stiff at times.
    And I’m afraid it’s for that very reason that my hands are tied. You can’t expect a man to run a kingdom if he doesn’t back up his general officers, now, can you? Political history and the history of my own family show that the monarch is much better off if the Army