and shown to you up to that point has been honest and real. Why would I stop being that now?”
He has a point. I’ve never met someone more selfless. He’s given himself to me in ways no one else has before. His time, his energy. And he’s asked nothing in return. My stern face crumbles, softening under his gaze. His hand creeps up my leg, resting on top of my hand.
“What in God’s name did you see in her? She’s not your type at all.” I slap his knee.
He smiles weakly. Something isn’t right with him.
“You like girls with beefy legs and long curly hair.”
He laughs, but then quickly turns solemn again, his jaw hardening. “Brynn, just know that I think you’re a beautiful person, inside and out and I’d never do anything to hurt you.”
I nod. “And that’s why we can’t be together.”
My breath hitches. Wait. I don’t think…I know I heard that wrong. It feels like I got punched in the gut.
“Chase, I don’t understand. Why would you say that? Please tell me.” There’s no life in my voice. It’s raw and shaky.
He smoothes the legs of his shorts and looks up at the sky.
“There’s no easy way to say this.”
“Then don’t say it. Just don’t say it.” Everything with me is always too good to be true. Just as I’m on the edge of things looking brighter for me, the rug is always pulled out from under me.
“I can’t let things get serious between me and you. He exhales and his green eyes turn cold, distant. “My past…I can’t let you get involved with me.”
“Everybody has a past. Look at my life. I’ve been through hell. I’m still going through it. But you help me see that things can get better. Please don’t do this. We can work things out. What can I do? Anything. Please don’t do this to me.”
“Brynn my past—”
“But you’re perfect. There’s nothing wrong with you. You…you—”
“I can’t let you in.”
I stand up flailing my hands and tears stream down my face. I’m shouting and I know I shouldn’t be. This isn’t the place for it.
“Don’t do this to me.” I stop my foot down on the concrete.
“I can’t let you get mixed up in my life.” He looks off into the distance. “My so-called life.”
I grab his hand. “We can work it out…together.” My voice is weak, trying to be demanding, but it’s too shrill from the pain of hearing his words.
“I have secrets Brynn. With everything that you’ve gone through recently…to get you caught up with me and have you fall apart, I couldn’t live with myself if you got wrapped up in this mess. I’m not who you think I am.”
“Just what are you saying? Tell me what happened. Please just tell me. I won’t judge you. You know that.”
He stands up and hauls his book bag over his shoulder. “Brynn. I care about you too much to have you mixed up with someone like me. I’m no good for you.”
“Don’t say that,” I say clutching his hand. He pulls away.
“Please Brynn. Don’t call me anymore.”
He turns from me and walks into the herd of students stampeding to class.
“Chase!” I shout. He doesn’t turn around. “Chase!” I scream louder.
Chapter 5
“Your mom is doing a lot better,” Aunt Vera says. We’re talking over Facetime and in front of me is a bowl of popcorn that I haven’t touched yet. After Chase broke it off with me I can’t seem to eat anything.
“Yeah, I know I just called her a little bit ago. She didn’t answer.” I’m trying my damndest to not break down in tears about Chase. So far I don’t think she can tell.
“She’s sleep I think. But, she’s really in good spirits. Finally out of the hospital.” She stammers, appearing to say something but trying to find the words.
“What’s wrong?”
She sighs. “It’s Robert.”
“Can we please not talk about him?”
“Well, I just thought you should know. He’s being sentenced on charges. The court date is next Thursday.”
That was fast. Good news. Good to know they’re not