be long before she wanted to claw her brain out, just to relieve the pain. “There’s just one problem. I
didn’t start a fucking Facebook page!
”
On the other end of the line, Darcy was silent.
The silence stretched out between them and guilt dropped down on her hard. This wasn’t Darcy’s fault. It was the fault of whoever had set up that page. And Shay now wanted to
strangle
that person. “Sorry for snapping. But, Darcy … you know me better than that,” she said, trying again. “Why would I have started a Facebook page? I don’t do that social media crap. And shit, I was in the hospital for more than two weeks. For a solid week, I couldn’t even
sit
, much less type on a computer and update it. I wasn’t even conscious.”
“Oh. Um. I guess … I don’t know. Shay, this is weird.”
Gee, ya think?
“Yes, it’s damn weird. That page isn’t mine. I don’t do these things. You know that.” She couldn’t. Not even under the guise of her pen name.Most of the world thought Shane was a guy—which was exactly
why
she’d picked that name. It was just one more way to help her stay hidden. Damn near everything she did was done with the purpose of either
staying
hidden or making it harder to
find
her. Making it harder for
him
to find her …
It’s your fault …
that ugly voice jeered at her from the back of her mind, loud and angry and awful.
Your fault. And you won’t forget—
She flinched as the screams echoed in her head.
Swearing, she pinched the bridge of her nose.
Not now. No falling apart now
. As the memories tried to push in, she pushed them out. It didn’t matter that they were so much worse lately than they used to be. The memories were from
then
, and they didn’t affect the crazy shit that seemed to happening right now.
Deal with that;
then
she could have her freak-out.
Freak out, then purge herself of the poison, just her and her diary.
“Darcy, think. Why would I have set up a Facebook page when the last thing I want to do is draw attention to myself?”
Another silence fell. It was so complete, Shay could hear Darcy’s ragged intake of breath. “You’re right. I never even thought of that. I was just so surprised to see your name …” She laughed nervously. “Surprised. Excited. All of that. I know why you keep to yourself and all, and I understand, but I guess I just thought enough time had gone by.”
No, Darcy … you don’t know why
. Swallowing, Shay said, “There’s no such thing as
enough time
.” She knew people wouldn’t understand that. They probably couldn’t. But they didn’t need to understand it. It wasn’t any of their business.
Absently, she reached up and touched the scars along the left side of her face; then, as panic tried to claw intoher, she touched one of the ridged lines under her shirt. Those scars were hidden, under her bra and T-shirt, but she saw them every day. Lived with them every day.
They reminded her. She’d lived through hell. She’d gotten out of hell. Nothing could be as bad as that.
Still, there was no such thing as
enough
time.
Crazy bastards didn’t care about the passage of time or much of anything else. Crazy bastards didn’t care about who they hurt, or how much damage they caused, as long as they got what they wanted.
One more reason why she kept to herself … fewer people to get hurt in any potential crossfire.
Looking away from the computer, Shay stared out the window. Her house was the only one around for miles. She’d chosen the isolated area because she felt safer here, away from anybody and everybody, but sometimes the isolation got to her, and now was one of those times.
The snowy, barren landscape seemed to be closing in around her and although it was only three in the afternoon, it was getting dark outside. One of the weird things about living in Alaska—the sun set damn early in the winter. This time of year, they had only a few hours of daylight before darkness enveloped the land