Spilled Milk: Based on a true story Read Online Free PDF Page B

we can walk there. I have two
suitcases. This one is yours.” I pointed. “Put some pajamas in there, no toys.
We’ll sneak out the window after everyone goes to bed. Okay?”
    Kat nodded and
walked over to her dresser to start packing.
    I was going to be twelve that summer. I finished
packing my suitcase while I remembered when Mom got her first back surgery. I
was seven then, and Dad started to tuck us in at night since Mom couldn’t do
that anymore. She couldn’t do much with rods and screws in her back. Always a
heavy sleeper, my sister would be tenderly snoring after a few minutes of him
rubbing her back and I would try not to fidget while I waited for my turn.
    I don’t remember how long it usually took me to fall
asleep. I don’t remember when my back rubs turned into chest rubs, and then
stomach rubs. By the time Dad was spending close to forty five minutes in my
room at bedtime I would pretend to be asleep, squeezing my eyes shut so hard I
would see white. You’re sleeping , I convinced myself, and everything
is fine because you’re sleeping. Everything is fine.
    I couldn’t call out. Mom was passed out from her
pills. Kat could sleep through an earthquake. The boy’s bedroom was on the
other side of the house. There was no one.
    Kat was a heavier sleeper, Dad knew this. He had spent
a long time on the side of my bed one night. That time it had hurt, and I held
my stomach when he got up to walk away afraid I would throw up. He crept to the
other end of the bed, though, and sat down next to Kat.
    Just as he was about to reach over I jumped up kicking
my legs and using my arms to hit the water bed.
    As the bed rolled and shook, Kat startled awake and
started crying. Dad bent down and tried to console her. His eyes struggled to
see me through the shadows of the room but when they met with mine they threatened
him in silence.
    Don’t you dare touch her . My pajamas were soaked with my tears as my chest
heaved. Don’t you dare lay a single finger on her. I’ll tell. Try me.
    My message was clear, and after Kat’s cries subdued,
he walked to the bedroom door and crept out without saying a word. I laid back
down and put my foot against my sister’s leg so I could monitor if there was
any movement, as I always did. I’ll protect you, baby sister, I’ll protect you.
    Mom couldn’t protect us anymore. Even if she wanted
to, she couldn’t. Those white pills did too much; she was in too much pain to
notice. That night I realized the new role I took in my family. I didn’t want
it. It became an unspoken rule from that point on. If I didn’t fight, if I kept
his secret, he wouldn’t hurt Kat. The idea was that as long as I knew he was
hurting me, he couldn’t be hurting her. It was the only way I knew how to
protect her. I had to protect her.
    When bedtime rituals became painful, I made the
decision to run away. Kat would have to come with me. I thought about my
brothers, but noticed that after Dad would spend the time in my room the night
before, he would take it easier on them the following day with his physical
attacks. He roared a little less. I figured if Kat and I were gone, maybe he
would be nicer to them. Then he wouldn’t be hurting me or my brothers. It had
to work.
    Adam and Thomas seemed calmer then too since they
didn’t have to run from his outstretched hand or his belt. I kept the harmony
and the balance. I shivered watching Kat close the latches on her suitcase. I
didn’t want to think about the next morning when everyone woke up to see us
gone. I hoped Adam and Thomas would protect each other if Dad tried to hurt
them. Maybe they would run away too.
    Mom had come home that afternoon from a doctor’s
appointment. She was scheduled to go in for another back surgery, but they
would need to wait because she had something called Shingles. She was talking
on the phone in the kitchen and I heard her saying that it was something
deadly. It was my deciding factor. If Mom was going to die, I had