Sorority Girls With Guns Read Online Free PDF

say Matt was the offender on more than one occasion.
    “ And if you eat here twice a day, that’s an extra fourteen dollars in a week you spent on stuff to clog your arteries,” I say. I actually read some of the textbook for that class. Like, at least twenty percent of what we were supposed to read.
    Charlie rolls his eyes. “A whole fourteen dollars? So what?”
    “ How much money have you already spent on food today?” Richard asks.
    “ For you?” the waiter asks, turning to me. He’s kind of cute in an offbeat, dating-this-guy-would-really-piss-off-my-parents sort of way. He’s wearing a nose ring, braids, a nametag that says “Hoolio” (which I’m pretty sure is not his real name) and an expression that says  “You’re my last hope for a good tip”.
    “ I’ll have the salad,” I say, as I see Matt adding up his daily food buys on his napkin. Unfortunately, this is the kind of place where waiters have Ipads and napkins are made of cloth, not paper.
    “ What type of dressing?” Hoolio glances at Richard’s napkin, his eyebrows pulling together in surprise.
    “ Light balsamic vinaigrette,” I check the red light on my phone to make sure I’m getting Matt’s fabulous display of cluelessness. “And no onions. I absolutely can’t stand onions. And extra tomatoes. Did you get that?”
    “ Uh…yeah.” Hoolio glances around the room as if hoping his boss will magically appear and tell Matt not to write on the tablecloth. Seeing no one but other hungry-looking guests, he moves down the line to take Tiffany’s order, pretending he didn’t see the napkin incident.
    “ Counting this meal, $24.50!” Matt announces triumphantly.
    I check the GluedToYou buttons on my bag – when you sign up for an account, GluedToYou sends you a dozen button cameras for free, along with a trademarked glue-bottle shaped button you're supposed to wear or pin to your clothes, to let people know you might be recording, for some sort of legal reason. When I started a new account for the bet, they sent me a dozen more, so all six of us have four. I have one on my purse, one on my collar, one on my phone (it's better quality than my cell camera and has wifi built-in) and the other one I'm reserving for emergencies. I can't lose any of them because GluedToYou does charge for replacements...and it looks like we're all going to spend all our money on food here in South Padre.
    “ Those prices on the menu don’t include tax,” Tiffany says in a stage whisper, leaning forward and resting her ample cleavage on the table. Like that’s going to help Matt concentrate on math!
    “ Do you charge for water?” Morgan asks, after Hoolio asks her what she wants to drink.
    Tiffany leans her head on Charlie's shoulder and bats her fake eyelashes at him. "You're paying for my meal, right?"
    "Um..." Charlie looks awkwardly at Tiffany, then looks around the table, then looks back at Tiffany. Or down at her assets. Just when I think he's lost-
    "Why should I pay for your meal?" he asks.
    Tiffany sits up and looks at him. "You always pay for dinner when we go out. You used to insist on it."
    "That was before," Charlie says, looking around the table for support. "When I wasn't, you know-" He leans toward Tiffany and lowers his voice. "-on a budget." He says it in an embarrassed whisper, like you might say "on medication for Herpes".
    "So you don't care about me any more, now that you're on a budget?" Tiffany scoots her chair so far away from Charlie's she's now practically sitting in my lap. I hope she doesn't expect me to buy her dinner, because that ain't happening either.
    "Of course I still care about you," Charlie says, reaching for her hand, which is not nearly as well-manicured as usual. Tiffany "economized" by painting her own nails, which means her left hand looks okay but her right hand looks like it was painted by a monkey who recently suffered a stroke. "I just can't afford to buy you dinner right now."
    Hoolio clears his throat.