Society of Heroes with Indeterminate Talent Read Online Free PDF Page B

"They've probably never seen real life superheroes before.  I would wave, but you know the whole not having the ability to move kind of restricts that."
    "They're staring because you look like Zorro strapped to a sack barrow." murmured Agent Two.  "Just keep your eyes on the people, look for any suspicious lurkers.  Ethel, how's your eyesight?"
    "I have a cataract in my left eye," she warbled.  "My Ophthalmologist said I need surgery, so I'm on the NHS waiting list."
    "Excellent!" said Agent Two.  "Well, you be the eyes Gary and Ethel, you be the…the…barrow holder and just be poised to spring into action."
    "What are we looking out for?" asked Gary looking mystified.
    "We're scoping for pickpockets.  It’s the most common crime on the underground transport system and there were 5,300 reported incidents last year.  This Piccadilly line leads to some major tourist attractions in London, so it's rife for a nimble-fingered thief."
    "Should we be targeting anyone in particular?"
    "Good question Inanimate man," replied Agent Two.  "Figures released by the British Transport Police show that over half of all pickpockets on the underground are Romanians."
    "What does a Romanian look like?"
    "Sort of like a cross between a Greek and an Italian, with a shifty look in their eyes." added Agent Two.
    "Greek-Italian and shifty, I got it." said Gary scanning the crowded platform.
    "But remember, pickpockets are very quick, that is why I chose you and Ethel for this mission because of your speed and mobility, so focus."
    Nodding, Gary and Ethel peered at the waiting commuters suspiciously while Agent Two made notes on his clipboard and paper.
    "Care for a mint, young man?" asked Ethel.
    Agent Two paused from his writing and looked up.
    "No, thank you."
    "Are you sure, it's Peppermint?"
    "Ethel, just keep your good eye trained over that way.  There's a good girl."
    She popped a peppermint in her mouth and sucked on it noisily before transferring her gaze back to the platform.
    Agent Two tried his very best to concentrate, to keep his eyes concentrated on anyone looking suspicious out on the platform, but the unbearable loudness of Ethel sucking on her mint kept distracting him and he felt his right eye twitching with every partial vacuum of her lips and tongue as she rolled the mint around her gums.
    It finally reached a point where he couldn’t take it anymore, and he cleared his throat a couple of times until Ethel looked back at him with a sliver of mint spittle forking down her chin.
    "I've noticed you've been sucking on the same mint now for an extended amount of time." remarked Agent Two through gritted teeth.
    Ethel paused then continued sucking loudly on the mint.
    "It's just that it's counter-productive to our operation is all." he added.
    "I like Peppermints; they're soothing on my gums."
    Agent Two was just about to say something when suddenly a commotion erupted at the platform.  A young man was yanking at a bag held on the arm of a middle-aged woman and she was resisting, shouting at passerby's to assist her.  She yelled at him as he snatched the bag with a snarl on his face and turned swiftly, sprinting in the opposite direction.
    "He stole my bag!" cried the woman hysterically.  "Get that man!"
    "I'll stop him!" yelled Agent Two throwing his clipboard to the ground and giving chase.
    Clenching his teeth in grim determination he ran after the thief who was scattering milling commuters in his wake, pushing and shoving them out of his way as he made his escape while throwing nervous looks over his shoulder at his pursuer.
    The bag snatcher was a young man, so he could run fast, and they were running out of platform as they headed to the escalators and Agent Two was slowing.  Suddenly Ethel sprinted past him with her plaid skirt hitched up to her knees with a grim expression on her face.
    "My lord!" gasped Agent Two fighting for breath as Ethel hurtled through the air and tackled the thief to the ground.
    She