Snow Blind Read Online Free PDF Page B

still feel for me.
    â€œI thought it would be great to spend time with him again!” I may have misjudged this completely, just because I have no residual feelings.
    â€œWe are just fine, the boat needs no rocking,” Sophia spits at me.
    â€œI am not here for that. I was relieved to hear he had finally asked you to marry him.”
    â€œWell you know that didn’t happen.” Sophia looks at me for the first time with panic in her eyes. If I were anyone else it looks like she would break down.
    â€œJuliet, let’s get your arse in the picture Juliet.” Robert mocks me from the hallway. I just smile and wave him away.
    â€œI thought he might propose when Bepe arrived, but nothing. Two years ago my papa got a Saturday night date from his golf club, Mere Park. Papa told him he had booked for a wedding. Dan smiles and says ‘Great babe’. There was no asking. Men don’t know their minds anymore. They are babies; they are Peter Pan.” Sophia kisses Bepe’s head as he sucks a Rusk.
    â€œI thought it would be safe to come now he is committed.”
    â€œWhat do you mean safe? Safe from you?” Sophia looks shocked again.
    â€œNo, no. I mean safe from the resentment he might have for me finishing with him.”
    â€œYou have a high opinion of yourself.” She puts Bepe in between us and sips her coffee.
    â€œNo. I just know he can be a little idealistic.”
    â€œLook here you, I know what this marriage is. I want Bepe to have a father okay; a boy needs a dad. You have a son, doesn’t he have a dad?”
    â€œA step-father.”
    â€œAnd where is his real dad?”
    â€œI had a fling immediately after Dan. I brought Ethan up on my own, but we have been living with Scott for five years now. He is a good father.”
    â€œAre you sure Ethan isn’t Dan’s son?” At last she strikes at the core of her suspicions.
    â€œOf course I am.” I issue a firm rebuttal
    â€œHe only got a third class degree because of you.” I left him and college in February 1992 in the middle of our final year. He exhausted me; his indecision left me spent. Nevertheless I shudder to think of his pain.
    â€œDon’t you dare upset him again!”
    â€œGet Juliet in the picture!” I hear the strain of Max’s shout. I momentarily think it is me they want, but no it is a reminder for Dan to bring the rubber doll into shot. Sophia privately enjoys my ridicule and I look to the floor in embarrassment. Bepe coughs hard flushing his face with blood; catarrh threatens to bring the Rusk back in liquid form.
    â€œCould I hold Bepe for a minute?” Sophia ignores me.
    â€œHow is Dan, Sophia?”
    â€œHe is infuriating but lovely. Max undervalues and takes advantage of him because they are old school friends. His music keeps him happy but reclusive.” In spite of Sophia’s hostility to me she opens the floodgates.
    â€œHe cannot say what I mean to him. He lives by himself still and has been hopeless at finding a house for us, so is moving into my parents’ house. He lets Bepe run riot; he almost got knocked down outside because of him. He is so distant from us sometimes; he is here but not here if you know what I mean. Why does he want me? Perhaps you can find out? I think he wants to marry me but have never heard why from him so who really knows?” She desperately wanted to say that doubt out loud.
    â€œHe is a one-off. You can protect him.” I don’t acknowledge her request, but feel the weight of its expectation.
    â€œAnyway, just think there would be no Bepe without him.”
    â€œMadonn’,” Sophia crosses herself.
    â€œI hope they behave for him.” I point towards the group who are now sitting astride each other as if in a rowing boat. Singing “Oopsupside-your-head” will be crucifying Dan.
    â€œI’ve met Chris before; he’s quiet but okay. Don’t know Max and Steve.