Slow Agony Read Online Free PDF

said. “I don’t want to see him. He doesn’t want to see me.” That wasn’t exactly true. I did want to see him. I’d wanted to see him every day since he’d walked out of my life. I missed him so much. His absence was a dark ache in my gut. Always there. Always hurting.
    In the background, Adele accused her old lover, telling him how they could have had it all.
    I snapped the radio off. The lyrics hit too close to home.
    “Look, this Marcel guy knows who he is, but neither of us know a thing about Marcel. And if he’s threatening you, I’m pretty sure Griffin wants to know about that.”
    I laughed bitterly. “I don’t think he cares. He hates me.”
    “He...” Knox floundered. “I’m sure he doesn’t
hate
you. He wouldn’t want you hurt on his account.”
    “Yeah, I’m not so sure about that.” I bit my lip, easing my car out onto the main road. “Anyway, this Marcel guy isn’t looking him up for a friendly chat. Griffin’s in danger. Don’t tell him anything. He could get hurt.” I still cared about him. I didn’t want anything to happen to him.
    “
You
could get hurt.”
    “Please, Knox. Just find another way?”
    He sighed. “Call me once you have another phone.”
    * * *
    I debated on going to Morgantown or Cumberland. Cumberland was a little bit closer. Morgantown was a little bit bigger. In the end, I found myself on the way to Cumberland and so I went that way. I wasn’t sure if it mattered.
    While I drove, I kept my eye on the cars around me. For long stretches of time, there were no cars behind me at all. None in front of me. Only an occasional one passing me.
    Was this guy following me or not?
    I had to assume that he was. But he’d also threatened to kill people in Thomas. How could he kill people in Thomas and follow me at the same time?
    He was lying about something. He was bluffing to scare me.
    It was working.
    He’d shot Naomi without a second thought. The violence was casual, easy. He didn’t care if he killed another person. He was inhuman and unfeeling. And that was terrifying.
    So I’d do what he said, even if his threats didn’t make sense. Even if I wasn’t sure he was following me or not.
    The road stretched out ahead of me, and I drove. I tried not to think about Naomi, about the way she’d sobbed in terror before Marcel had shot her dead. I tried not to think about my friend Stacey, last year, her eyes glassy and empty as she lay on the floor of her house. She was dead too. Both of them. Dead. Because I’d befriended them.
    If Griffin was here, he might give me some bullshit story about how loss was the only way someone understood the importance of life. But Griffin wasn’t here. And I knew life was important. People didn’t need to die for me to realize that.
    I bit my lip hard. I concentrated on not falling apart. I drove.
    I thought about Marcel again. The more I thought about this guy, the less sense he made to me. He wanted Griffin, right?
    So why involve Naomi at all?
    If he was so sure that I could contact Griffin, then why not simply capture me and force me to call Griffin myself? Certainly, if he thought we were still together, my terrified voice would have worked better.
    For that matter, if he was so sure that I had Griffin’s phone number, why didn’t he go through my phone himself?
    It had been sitting on my coffee table, as he’d pointed out to me.
    Maybe he’d looked at the phone while I was sleeping. Maybe he’d seen that Griffin’s name wasn’t there, and that was why he woke me up.
    Ugh. None of it made any sense. Knox said the guy wasn’t Op Wraith. But he hadn’t died when I shot him.
    He mentioned something about jail. Maybe he was someone Griffin knew in jail. But if that were true, why did he want Griffin?
    Thinking of Marcel was making me think of Griffin. My Griffin. The man I thought I’d be spending the rest of my life with. And it was hurting too much. I wasn’t going to see Griffin again.
    My thoughts were jagged and