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it down exposing her bottom teeth. She raises her eyebrows waiting for me to comply. I do as I am told, although it feels awkward. “Then lower your lashes like this.” She casts her eyes downward, her eyes taking on a hooded look. “Then say, can you help me with something?’ ” She pushes her lips out further and looks up coyly. I do what she says and she claps her hands together in praise. A nagging sensation tugs at me even though I have their obvious approval.
    “I do not wish to anger the male darkling. He is letting me stay at this circle. I am thankful.” I do not say I am fearful that the dark witches and my future husband are looking for me, but I sense that something big is coming. Bec is now standing behind Lana as they both look down at me.
    They eye me speculatively, then Bec speaks. “Trust us he will not be angry . Now practice laughing and lip biting. After that, we need to teach you to hunt.”
    Lana laughs and then says, “Bec, duh. We are teaching her to hunt.” If lip chewing and gilded laughter keep me here and in their protection, I will do it. Every second that passes that distances myself from my fate makes me more content. I need to stay here with these darklings.
    “How can I feel more?” As I ask, I fist my palm and realize the wound has closed completely. I frown.
    “Try to pull up memories from when you were a child. Like the one you told me about. Try to associate feelings with them. When I play…” Lana grabs a rock off a table and chucks it at Bec. Bec shrewdly ducks and scoops it off the ground. When she stands I see a sparkle of something in her eye. Lana continues, “I feel happy. Or joyful…”
    Bec interrupts, “Or conniving.” She throws the rock back and pelts Lana in the arm.
    “Ow. Jerk. I knew I wouldn’t hit you. You’re too quick.” Lana squeezes her biceps and pulls up her sleeve to caress the red mark. “You didn’t have to throw it so hard. I just wanted to make a point.”
    “And now you feel anger?” I ask confused how happiness or joy can turn into anger so quickly.
    “No, I’m not mad at her. Well maybe a little.” Lana squints her eyes at Bec and shows her teeth in a pretend growl. “My arm just hurts. Emotions are all connected. If you feel anger and fear, making the leap to joy won’t be hard, especially if you want it.” I comprehend what she says, but I do not think it will be easy to feel something more.
    “What if they come for me?” I let the fear escape as I ask them the question that clouds my mind.
    Lana shrugs her shoulders. “Then they come for you. We don’t fight the dark witches, Emma. We’d lose. We don’t use magic. They get whatever they want. We can only hope that by the time they come for you, you can feel. If you can feel more emotions, then you have a defense against them. Almost a way to shield yourself…protect your own ass.”
    “Why can’t you use magic?”
    “We’ve never used our magic. Our bodies never embraced that side. We were taught to fight it off when we were young and now it never surfaces. At all. We couldn’t use it even if we wanted to without a lot of practicing,” Bec says. I let her words float around in my mind. It is comforting to know they are able to control themselves. It gives me hope that I too will be able to keep it at bay. Even as I feel my magic surfacing in this very moment, I want to will it. I want to control it. I want to own it and destroy it at the same time.
    The vibrating starts and I know my eyes are glowing white, but unlike the night before when it took over my body completely, this time I force it back down. I am unaware of my surroundings. I know Bec and Lana are close by, but they do not interrupt me. This is my inner turmoil that I have to deal with alone. They have already fought their battles.
    I stand and say, “No.” It comes out more loudly than I intend it to. I shut my eyes and grab my pants to control my hands. The humming electricity leaves my body and