Shell Shocked (The Cosmic Carapace, #1)

Shell Shocked (The Cosmic Carapace, #1) Read Online Free PDF Page B

Book: Shell Shocked (The Cosmic Carapace, #1) Read Online Free PDF
Author: Barnaby Yard
Tags: Humor, adventure, Steampunk, scifi fantasy, parallel worlds, funny scifi, funny books
this were possible.
    “Right, see you soon friend!” He strode out of the door as abruptly a he'd come, though Spencer noticed he had paused for just a second in the doorway, framing himself and puffing his chest slightly before leaving.
    Prat, thought Spencer.
    Suddenly as though this thought had jogged his memory some how, he realised he was gripping something hard, tightly in his hands. He squinted down and stared into the face of the tortoise. Spencer's knuckles were white around it's shell. It gave him a look which suggested that it's all well and good staring at me through two blackening eyes and feeling sorry for yourself, but where's the lettuce? That's what I'd like to know... it was a very expressive look.
    The door opened again and Spencer mentally confirmed that he was definitely concussed, as the same, slim and pale woman walked through the door twice. Spencer swung his feet off the bed and waited for every muscle in his body to stop screaming and for the room to stop spinning like that.
    “Hi, you'll feel better once you drink this.” The one on the left handed him a tall glass with a cloudy liquid that resembled lemonade in it. There was ice and a slice of lemon, which Spencer definitely approved of. His mouth was so dry he wasn't entirely sure that it hadn't fused together. He took the drink and swigged greedily.
    There are many sensations which are difficult to explain adequately. The gentle fall of snow on your face, the squeeze a loved one gives your hand, the first sight of your newborn child. If Spencer had been asked to describe his first taste of fog, he probably would have gone for something like this...
    Imagine being punched down the throat with a fist made of sandpaper, whilst simultaneously your nose hair is singed by fumes which rush up to the sinuses and explode with pain. Imagine your chest explodes with a burning fire. Imagine your vision instantly blurs, daubs of colour dancing before you. Imagine every bit of adrenaline you have ever felt in your life multiplied by two and injected somewhere delicate at once. This all occurs in the first half a second of your first sip, from there things go downhill.
    Spencer shot bolt upright onto his feet, clutching at his throat.
    “Ugghaaarrrgllleehhh!”
    “Yes, that's normally what people say the first time!” replied one half of the lady his concussion had supplied him with. The other half placed a small plate with a bacon sandwich on it beside him on the bed as Spencer slowly sat down again and began to vibrate. He was feeling better. In fact he was feeling great. Admittedly this maybe because around 30 seconds ago he was mentally and physically in a pretty accurate version of hell, but even so, this was better. The smell of the bacon was too much. He rather impolitely grabbed the sandwich and started talking for the first time since coming to, with his mouth full.
    “What happened, and what the hell was that I just drank?”
    “You’re shell shocked. It happens when you cross over, but normally it’s not as bad as that, but you hadn’t had any fog.”
    He looked up at the the two women in front of him. They really were identical. He was starting to realise that these were in fact two different women, and not the result of a blow to the head.
    They both had jet black hair in a bob to their shoulders, pale skin and large dark eyes that were sparkling with amusement. Tall and willowy, they wore matching black puritan style dresses which went straight down, as did they. The one on the right introduced them both.
    “I'm Esme and this is my sister Eva. You need to sleep, so we have drugged your bacon sandwich.”
    Spencer spluttered on the last mouthful as he shouted in panic, they both turned as one towards the door. Eva turning at the last minute as Spencer's eyes became heavy and not for the first time that day, the room began to swim.
    “Night, night!”
    ~~~~
    B ecky Ness was staring intently at the handle of her handbag. It was probably
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