Sexing the Cherry Read Online Free PDF

weighty and women light. Therefore it is simple to tie a stone round their necks and drown them should they become too troublesome.
    6. Men are best left in groups by themselves where they will entirely wear themselves out in drunkenness and competition. While this is taking place a woman may carry on with her own life unhindered.
    7. Men are never never to be trusted with what is closest to your heart, and if it is they who are closest to your heart, do not tell them.
    8. If a man asks you for money, do not give it to him.
    9. If you ask a man for money and he does not give it to you, sell his richest possession and leave at once.
    10. Your greatest strength is that every man believes he knows the sum and possibility of every woman.
    I was much upset when I read this first page, but observing my own heart and the behaviour of those around me I conceded it to be true. Then my heaviness was at its limit and I could not raise myself up from where I was sitting. But I did look around me and I saw that I was one in a long line of unfortunates sitting like crows on a fallen tree. All were wailing piteously and none could move on account of their sorrows.
    I was lucky that my hands were free, and reaching down into my fish basket I took out a red mullet and waved it over my head.
    Soon a flock of sea birds appeared screeching at the sight of the fish. I waved another in my left hand, and as I had hoped the birds dived to catch the fish.
    When they fastened their beaks on to my bait I did not let go and the birds, maddened at any resistance to their feeding, flapped all the harder and succeeded in pulling me up with them. I let go at once, but the birds, somehow imagining me as a great fish, carried me up into the air and flew me over the city and out to sea.
    Far below I watched the waves crashing against high cliffs and saw the sails of ships passing to the Tropics. I fainted from fear, and when I revived I was no longer in the air but seemed to be on the windowsill of a well-appointed house in a town I did not recognize. A young girl came to the window and, asking me if I were the sister she had prayed for, courteously invited me to bed with her, where I passed the night in some confusion.

    What is love?
    On the morning after our arrival at Wimbledon I awoke in a pool of philosophic thought, though comforted by Jordan's regular breathing and the snorts of my thirty dogs.
    I am too huge for love. No one, male or female, has ever dared to approach me. They are afraid to scale mountains.
    I wonder about love because the parson says that only God can truly love us and the rest is lust and selfishness.
    In church, there are carvings of a man with his member swollen out like a marrow, rutting a woman whose teats swish the ground like a cow before milking. She has her eyes closed and he looks up to Heaven, and neither of them notice the grass is on fire.
    The parson had these carvings done especially so that we could contemplate our sin and where it must lead.
    There are women too, hot with lust, their mouths sucking at each other, and men grasping one another the way you would a cattle prod.
    We file past every Sunday to humble ourselves and stay clean for another week, but I have noticed a bulge here and there where all should be quiet and God-like.
    For myself, the love I've known has come from my dogs, who care nothing for how I look, and from Jordan, who says that though I am as wide and muddy as the river that is his namesake, so am I too his kin. As for the rest of this sinning world, they treat me well enough for my knowledge and pass me by when they can.
    I breed boarhounds as my father did before me and as I hoped Jordan would do after me. But he would not stay. His head was stuffed with stories of other continents where men have their faces in their chests and some hop on one foot defying the weight of nature.
    These hoppers cover a mile at a bound and desire no sustenance other than tree-bark. It is well known that their