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hats. “May I remind you that looking perfect at a wedding is a very serious business?”
    No kidding. Each bridesmaid had shelled out over eight thousand dollars for gown, handbag, shoes, fur, and girdle, and that was just one outfit in a week of special events. Add Mad Hatter costume, gifts, dermabrasions, hair coloring, luggage, cocktail dresses, jewelry, airfare and whatnot, and the bottom line edged close to fifteen thousand dollars per bridesmaid. Fortunately each girl’s parents recognized that this wedding was a critical investment in the family pedigree. No one was about to complain when Thayne was spending four times that much on each bridesmaid.
    â€œQuiet, girls!” Kimberly hissed. “I don’t know what’s gotten into them, Mrs. Walker.”
    â€œThank you, Kimberly. You’re such a grown-up. Had Wyeth allowed a maid of honor, you would have been it.” Thayne returned to the last slide, showing a model in a white fox stole. “Everyone has purchased her Maximilian?” “Yes, Mrs. Walker!”
    Was that a hiccup? “Hopefully this is what you will all look like tomorrow evening. Fabulous doesn’t even begin to describe what I see.”
    A Russian supermodel sashayed down a runway in the gown, shoes, purse, stole, earrings, hairdo, and presumably undergarments that Thayne’s ten bridesmaids would be wearing tomorrow. “I’ll let you dream about that overnight,” Thayne said, swiftly packing up her laptop.
    â€œWhere are you going, Mama?” Pippa whispered in the dark. “Last-minute details.” Thayne kissed her daughter’s cheek. “The perfume was a huge hit, no?” “Definitely.”
    Thayne paused at the door. “Your limo will be at the hotel at five sharp to take you to the rehearsal. Wear your prettiest dresses, please.” With that, she rushed off to her next appointment.
    â€œSomething’s wrong,” Pippa whispered to Ginny. “She didn’t stay to yell at the waiters about poor service.”
    The flasks of vodka resurfaced immediately. Kimberly nodded to Lorenzo, who went behind a screen and emerged with a cart piled with gifts. “Pippa, we all wanted to give you a little something for your wedding night. Of course we’re all terribly jealous and wish we were screwing Lance ourselves.”
    Pippa blushed, thinking Kimberly was joking. “Is this a staglet party now?”
    â€œWhatever.” Kimberly read the first card. “From Charlotte.” That was an edible teddy. From Francesca: crotchless silk panties. Tara: illustrated book of top one hundred sex positions. Hazel: cream formulated to heat up on contact with sex organs. Steffani: black lace garter belt and fishnet stockings. Cora: white peignoir. Kimberly: a pound of See’s chocolates. Leah: silver handcuffs. Chardonnay: large vibrator for when Lance got tired. Ginny: season ski pass to Aspen.
    Kimberly frowned. “What does a ski pass have to do with Pippa’s wedding night?”
    â€œNothing. That’s where I’ll be after Costa Rica, in case the newly-weds want to visit.”
    A
knock: Harry, Rosimund’s majordomo, stood in the doorway. He held a silver tray mounded with small boxes. “Mrs. Henderson sends her apologies for missing the luncheon.” Harry pretended not to see the pile of feathers, garters, and other unmentionables in front of Pippa. “She hopes you will accept these small tokens of appreciation for participating in her son’s nuptials.”
    Harry distributed ten little boxes. Inside were platinum barrettes containing subtly larger diamonds and two Tahitian pearls slightly larger than those on the earrings Thayne had just given everyone. Harry receded while the bridesmaids were still gasping in shock and awe.
    Pippa tapped her water glass with the silver handcuffs. “Sorry to break up the fun, but in ten minutes we’re expected in the presidential