Scars of the Past Read Online Free PDF

makeup and Sydney choose my outfit, although vetoing the skirt she’d handed me and pulled on jeans instead.
    I sat on the bathroom floor long after the steam had dissipated from my shower, and my body was cold. I could hear footsteps pass the door every now and then, and I knew my friends were debating whether they should knock or leave me alone. I don’t know how long I had been in there when Sydney eventually lost the leave-Maddie-alone war and knocked softly.
    “Maddie? Are you okay in there?” It sounded more like a plea instead of a question. I ran my hands down my face and took a deep breath before standing and opening the door.
    Sydney stood there looking as though she hadn’t slept at all, and I knew she felt partially responsible. I also knew that I should reassure her, but I couldn’t find the energy. I saw her indecisively lift her arm to embrace me before she dropped it back to her side.
    “Can I do anything for you?”
    I stared at her a moment and moved out of the doorway so she could come into the bathroom. “Actually yeah. I could use some help putting a bandage back over my back.”
    She gasped when I turned to drop my robe, and I looked back at her questioningly. “It’s bleeding again. There’s blood all over your robe.”
    I just shrugged and handed her the gauze, ointment, and tape and let her cover it up best she could.
    When she finished, I pulled my robe back on and turned around to find Amanda outside the door, watching us. She was dressed in a black skirt with the matching embroidered black top- the uniform we wore when we served at a catered event.
    “I told Melissa that you were sick,” she explained to me, looking guilty. “I didn’t know if you’d want to go, but I don’t think you should.”
    She was right. If I had gotten the call I probably would have tried to go in. Working as a catering waitress wasn’t bringing in the riches my any means, especially because the hours and schedule were nowhere near regular. Amanda and I had been doing it for over two years, and even though it wasn’t glamorous, it could be fun at times. But even thinking about working, about facing a bunch of random people, made me tired.
    “Yeah, thank you. I think I might just go lay back down.”
    She nodded approvingly before leaning in to give me a brief hug, carefully avoiding my back, and then turned back towards the living room.
    Sydney said goodbye to Amanda and followed behind me quietly as I walked down the hall to my room.  She stood in the doorway, looking uncertain.
    “Mad, I…” She turned her face away, and ran a hand through her super short hair. Taking a deep breath she plastered a very fake smile on her face. “Want something to eat? Soup?”
    The thought of food made my stomach swim unpleasantly but Sydney looked like she needed to do something to keep from falling apart.
    “Sure, Syd. Soup sounds great.”
    I sat back in the bed and contemplated turning the TV on just to drown my thoughts, but instead I picked up my phone for the first time since last night. I had several texts from Amanda asking if Sydney and I had made it home yet, but otherwise it was quiet. The world had gone on around me while it felt like mine had stopped.
    I heard Sydney moving around in the kitchen, her voice low and muffled told me she was on the phone with someone. I figured it was probably my mom, doing the mom thing and checking up on me. I snuggled into my warm bed and closed my eyes, hoping that maybe sleep would find me for a little while longer.
    –––
    “You like that, don’t you?”
    I awoke with a start, the sound of his voice reverberating through my subconscious. My room was dark, and the clock on my nightstand told me it was now almost 11:00 pm. For a few moments I just lay there, trying to regulate my breathing and calm my racing heart. I thought about trying to go back to sleep, but my stomach reminded me that I hadn’t given it anything since the night before.
    I stood up, my legs