Saved by the SEAL Read Online Free PDF

laugh around him at all.
    I laugh with my buddies sometimes when we’re at work, trying to break a tense situation. Or when we’re out having a few beers. But this is really laughing…letting go. Being loose. It’s light, and for some reason, it makes me hopeful.
    It feels different. It feels good .
    We start watching a movie about a man and a woman who go back to their hometown for a funeral after being high school lovers. I’m not supposed to like it because it’s a chick flick. But I find myself drawn into the story, wanting to know what’s going to happen with the couple now.
    Midway through, I have to stand up and stretch my leg. I can’t sit for long stints like this anymore without feeling like I need to walk, exercise my good limb a little bit. It’s something I’ve had to do ever since the explosion. I stand, flexing, trying to be as casual about it as I can.
    I can feel Greta’s eyes on me as I walk to the counter and do a couple of standing knee flexes. Knowing she’s watching me sends a flush of embarrassment creeping up my neck. The last thing I want is for her to see me as weak. Or as less than what I was before.
    When we first met, I was whole.
    But I came back from the other side of the world with a piece missing. My imagination runs away, weaving the tale of what she must think of me now.
    When I return to the couch, she reaches over and places a hand on the thigh of my leg that was partly amputated. My muscle tenses under her touch, the skin of my neck heats. I reach down and grab her hand in mine. It’s warm and soft, and I squeeze it gently as I look over at her.
    “Does it hurt?” she whispers.
    I shake my head with a small smile. “No.”
    “Did it? Hurt? I mean…when it happened?”
    I don’t answer for a minute, and she misinterprets my silence.
    “I’m sorry, Grisham…I didn’t mean to…just forget I asked.”
    Her hair forms a veil around her face as she looks down at her lap. I lift her hand to my chest and tug until she looks at me.
    “Please don’t ever apologize for asking honest questions. People never do that. They stare and they wonder, or they obviously try not to stare when I know they really want to. No one, even my family and friends, comes right out and asks about it. My dad has actually never even bothered to have an honest conversation with me about what happened. Not once.”
    She nods. Her face is certain; there’s not a hint of hesitation there. “I want to know.”
    I sigh and lean my head back against the couch cushions. Going back to that night…it’s not something I ever willingly do. I had to talk to a therapist about it, and I opened up as fully as I could. I think the talking helped, but it’s hard as hell to revisit what happened.
    “An RPG hit our convoy as we were on our way in as support for a unit of Rangers. The hum-vee in front of us took a direct hit, but we caught a big portion of the explosion. It hurt, Greta. It felt exactly the way you’d imagine it would feel to have one of your limbs literally blown off your body. But when you’re out there…in a situation like that, you can’t focus on the pain. You have to focus on living. On surviving. So that’s what I did. I focused on living and making sure my men were out of danger. And then I don’t remember anything else until I woke up in Germany.”
    She sucks in a loud, hissing breath through her mouth. “I can’t imagine. How did you adjust to having a prosthetic?”
    I smirk at the memory of waking up in the hospital. “When I realized the leg was gone from the knee down, I was pissed. Really fucking pissed. I thought it would completely change my life. And it has…but prosthetics are really, really good these days. There’s a lot I can still do. I probably won’t be able to be active duty much longer, but I’m going to get to finish out this year with my team at least.”
    She nods. “And then what?”
    Shrugging, I close my eyes briefly. This is something I worry about