Road To Whatever (Perfect For Me Book 1) Read Online Free PDF Page B

Linc to pull up beside me. I straighten and walk over to the passenger side of his car. Linc gets out and walks over to me placing his hands on my waist.
    “Kit, I just want you to hear me out,” Linc starts and I know this is going to be bad. “I love you so much Kitty, I think we can make this work… no listen… if we don’t work out then we can say we tried and we can go back to being friends.”
    “Linc, it’s not that easy and I think it would be a big mistake,” I sigh as I try to get him to see my point for the millionth time. Before I can point out all the reasons to stay friends Linc has his lips pressed to mine pushing me up against his car.
    I go stiff when his lips first meet mine but for a second I forget this is Linc and give in. His lips are so soft and he is kissing me like he needs me. His warm tongue traces the seam of my lips and snakes its way into my mouth. It is warm and sweet, not at all what I was expecting as his tongue gently flicks at mine. I’ve totally forgotten where I am and with whom I am with when I roll up on my toes and wrap my arms around Linc’s neck.
    Linc releases a groan deep in the back of his throat as he reaches for my backside and squeezes as he lifts me up into him. I feel his arousal press against my stomach and it is like a bucket of ice cold water bringing me back to my senses. This is so bad, so wrong. I have to think, this is Linc, we can’t do this.
    I pull away trying to back up only to back into his car as he moves forward and cages me in with his arms. For a moment, looking up at those brown eyes and watching the sunlight dance in his blonde hair making it look like gold, I think that maybe just maybe I could give into this gorgeous guy and make him happy. 
    I sigh because in a relationship we should both be happy and I would not be happy. That kiss was … it was great but it is not what I want. Linc is not what I want, not in that way. I wrap my arms around my middle and look down at my feet.
    “No Kelly, No,” Linc whispers in a broken voice. “Baby, please don’t pull away.”
    “I can’t Linc,” I sob. “I’m sorry.”
    Linc pushes his hands through his hair and blows out a deep breath. I can see his heart breaking but what am I to do? I love him too, just not the way he wants. “I’ll call you later okay? I just need to go get some sleep,” Linc says coolly.
    I nod but I know this is a lie. Linc disappears for weeks at a time after every time he asks me out and I turn him down. This time he kissed me and I still said no, so I am sure this time it will be worse. He has no idea how much it hurts when he does that. It is one of the reasons I won’t risk us. I walk over to my bike throwing my leg over and pulling my helmet on. I take a moment for the sobs to subside and then start out for Mandy’s.
    When I pull in front of the house I sit on my bike wanting to hit something. I revved the engine a few times instead, letting my bike thunder underneath me. The rumble does little to calm me but it is something. I cut the engine and start for the house.
    Mandy tears the door open and with one look at me she knows. I can see the pain register in her face. However, for the first time I think about it and I am not sure who she feels pain for, me or my best friend who keeps coming back to me to have his heart broken. I feel like a monster. Some part of me knows I should just let him go because he wants something I can never give him. I don’t know if I can give it to anyone. Maybe I am too broken to love anyone.
    “Oh no Kelly, he tried again,” Mandy chokes out. I nod and step into her arms as she closes the door. “I told him not to.”
    “What’s wrong with me? Why can’t I want him,” I sob.
    “You want what you want Kit,” Mandy sighs.
    “What do I want,” I whine.
    “I don’t know honey. You tell me,” Mandy coos as she rubs my hair.
    “I want someone that only wants me, Mandy. You know, someone that needs me so much no one else