CCTV camera â weâd have him on record if he turned out to be a fake. Then a minute to pull on jeans and a sweater, another to drag a brush through my hair and yet another to yell at Griff to stir himself. And even then I hadnât got any shoes on.
Remembering all Griff had said about breathing and posture, at last I opened the door.
âDS Will Kinnersley, Kent Police,â he said, flashing his ID again.
I took a good look. It seemed OK. So I stood back to let him in, closing the door behind him.
âYouâve come about my body, have you?â I asked. When he looked completely blank, I said, very formally, âDo sit down.â Then I added, because one of us was clearly missing something, âLook, Iâve got to get my caffeine fix or you might as well talk Chinese. Fancy a cup?â
I brought through a papier mâché tray, loaded with a couple of pretty early nineteenth century coffee cans, and milk and sugar in all that was left of an 1810 Newhall tea service. Everything was good, of course, but not perfect â perfect would have had to go into the shop.
He did a bit of a double take when he saw the handleless cups, but said nothing. He almost turned the milk jug upside down to check the mark but realized it wasnât a good idea.
âRegency,â he managed.
âIf youâve got it, you might as well use it,â I pointed out. âAnd antique dealers do have a lot of china. How can I help?â
âIâm Kent Policeâs Heritage Officer,â he said, reeling off what was obviously his usual spiel, âwith special responsibility for locating and identifying objects illegally removed from historical sites.â
So what was that to do with my body? But I ought to try to say something intelligent. âAh! You mean you catch these night hawk people, who use metal detectors without permission and dig up and ruin historical sites. Brilliant.â I smiled. Generally speaking, I did prefer people to be on the right side of the Law.
Griff would have known the right word to describe his expression. Non-something. Was it nonplussed? Could be. Anyway, he looked pretty puzzled, as if Iâd wrong-footed him somehow.
âNo oneâs offered us anything dodgy,â I continued, since he was still silent. âBut I promise that if they do, weâll get on to you straightaway.â
He swallowed, his Adamâs apple doing a little bobble. âIt was more what youâve been offering, Miss Townend â itâs Evelina, isnât it?â
âLina, like Lena Horne. Now youâve lost me. What am I supposed to have offered? We did a pretty good trade at Detling the other day, but apart from a bit of Loetz, which was actually a return, everything was our usual period â Victorian.â Feeling that he wanted something else, I added, âDo you want to see the receipt book?â
He didnât say he didnât, but asked, âDo you have the original receipts for the objects you offered the British Museum yesterday?â
At last it dawned on me what he was implying. Griff preferred me not to swear before seven in the evening, so I didnât say all the things I wanted. âHellâs bells,â I managed, which was pretty lame, considering, âI didnât think that Douggie â whatâs his name? Sir Douglas Nelson? â was very pleased to see us. But grassing us up for no reason! Bloody hell!â
âMy dear one, I do wish you wouldnât soil your lips with such expressions! Ah, good morning.â Spruce as if heâd had half an hour to complete what he always called his
toilette
Griff looked expectantly at DS Kinnersley, shaking his hand as I performed the introductions.
Usually Iâd have nipped out and brought him coffee too, but I didnât want to miss anything Kinnersley said. They were my rings, after all. Sighing, Griff took the hint, reappearing a moment later with his