Recollections of Rosings Read Online Free PDF Page B

made it easier for Her Ladyship to demand the same degree of compliance from the rest of us. You were probably fortunate, Becky—you acquired an early reputation for recalcitrance, and I do believe she gave up expecting you to do as she advised."
        Becky did not hide her consternation. "Advised! Commanded, more likely. Yes, I was very much the black sheep, was I not? I recall how angry she became when I said I wanted to be a writer. I was only a little girl, but she addressed me with such seriousness—it was as though I had announced my intention to join the Revolution! She ordered me to abandon such a foolish notion forthwith. 'Women,' she declared, without fear of contradiction, 'should have better things to do than waste their time on such frippery,' and she urged Mama to have me taught to sew and knit and make pin cushions, which she said would help me get a good, respectable husband—and a boring one, no doubt! I recall telling Mr Tate about it when we became engaged and we had a good laugh about her Ladyship's notions. He was not particularly troubled by my lack of skill in sewing or making pin cushions."
        Becky was enjoying herself, recounting the days of her youth, when she suddenly noticed her sister's countenance. Catherine looked deeply unhappy, as though some painful memory from the past had intruded itself upon her thoughts.
        Becky was immediately solicitous. "Why, Cathy dear, what is it? Are you not well? Do forgive me for going on and on, I wasn't thinking… I do apologise…"
        Catherine brushed aside her concerns. "I am quite well, Becky, it's just that recalling Lady Catherine reminded me of something she once said about her daughter. She declared to Mrs Jenkinson and myself that Miss Anne de Bourgh could well have married a knight of the realm, who had shown some interest in her, if not that her poor health would not let her live in Scotland!"
        Becky exploded, "And how pray was this to happen when she scarcely let the poor creature out of her sight? Cathy, I truly believe Lady Catherine had quite lost any connection with reality. How else would she make such a preposterous prediction?"
        "Ah well," said her sister, "you certainly proved her wrong, Becky; you have achieved your ambition to be a writer and you have married a most eligible and successful gentleman as well. Lady Catherine would have been very pleased and not a little surprised, I'm sure."
        Rebecca did not respond to this statement.
        Their confidences had not included the current, somewhat parlous state of her own marriage. She had been reluctant to speak of it, too mortified to reveal the truth, even to a beloved sister.
        Catherine continued, "I suppose, Becky dear, there are times when every one of us must wish we had acted differently. I have often wondered how very different our lives might have been had Papa not been appointed to the living at Hunsford and we were not brought so totally under the influence of Lady Catherine de Bourgh. I do not wish you to think I am ungrateful for all she did for me; indeed, in many ways there was little difference in her treatment of myself and her daughter Anne, and being blessed with good health, I was better able to benefit from those opportunities than poor Miss de Bourgh. But one cannot help wishing we might have been a little more emancipated," said Catherine.
        Puzzled by this cryptic remark, Becky wanted to pursue the matter but was thwarted by the arrival at that moment of Lilian, who on finding her mother's bed empty had come downstairs to look for her. Seeing her with Rebecca and noting that she looked weary, she asked with more than a little concern in her voice, "Mama, are you not coming to bed? It is well past midnight."
        Catherine rose and, bidding her sister good night, accompanied her daughter up the stairs, leaving Rebecca to follow later.
        Earlier that same evening, Dr Whitelaw had called to