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early, but her nerves were rattled and she was delaying the inevitable. She’d learned the hard was that with him, “special” didn’t always mean “good”. She didn’t allow herself to fall into memories of not-so-great times, so she turned her attention back to work.
    She finished sending off the emails she needed to get out in preparation for the conference call and, after another fifteen minutes or so, began to gather her belongings. After a quick trip to the restroom to freshen up, she headed to her car and made her way home.  She popped in a Stevie Wonder compilation CD she made filled with her favorite love songs of his. She began to hum along to “Joy Inside My Tears”.   You, you, you… made like history…you brought the joy inside my tears…  Seemed like she’d had more tears than joy lately, but…that happens in relationships, she guessed. Traffic was unusually light this evening and she said a silent prayer of appreciation because being late was not even remotely an option. Pulling off of the expressway at the exit that would take her to her neighborhood, she began to feel sick to her stomach. Saying a silent prayer for mercy, she locked up her car in the garage and headed to their home.
     
     
    5:58 p.m.
     
    As she got off of the elevator, Nicole could hear the velvety tone of Luther Vandross’s sultry voice wafting through the hallway coming from their apartment.  She couldn’t help but smile because she knew that meant he was “in the mood”.  She shook her head at her own worry, exhaled the deep breath she only now realized she was holding, and walked towards the door. As she got closer, she smelled chicken frying.  He is cooking? What on earth?   She knew he had something “special” planned, indeed. If he cooked once a month it was excessive. The kitchen was certainly her domain and that is how he expected it to be, so whenever he cooked, she became suspicious. What does he want now? She tried to ignore the concerns developing in her head and keep an open mind.  You never know…
    She walked into the apartment greeted by a stronger aroma of chicken frying and a freshly-baked sweet potato pie, both his specialties. She remembered how he brought her a homemade sweet potato pie on their second date, which was rather impressive because it actually tasted delicious.  As she took off her coat, she could hear him making his way towards her. She looked up and saw that smile, the smile that made her weak still, years later. His parents spent good money on that smile, as he often joked, so he made it his business to flash his perfect set of teeth whenever possible. She loved seeing it now; it felt comfortably reassuring.
    He walked towards her, reaching in to wrap his arms around her waist and bury his face in her neck. As he inhaled her scent, she laced her arms around his neck, gently biting his ear. She felt his response as he pulled her closer against his lower body.
    “See, you trying to get things started already,” he chided.
    “Well, Sir, you’re the one in here cooking my favorite foods and playing “big” Luther, and you said you had something special planned for me, so…” she reminded him.
    “Mmmhmmm,” he moaned into her neck. “I absolutely do. But first, we eat! Go undress while I finish cooking and I’ll meet you in the dining room,” he said with a kiss on her cheek and a light smack on her buttocks. She jumped, giggling, and made her way to their bedroom.
    While undressing, she thought about how this was a nice change for them. Things had been rough recently and Nicole had so many conflicting thoughts and feelings running through her mind, heart, and spirit.  There were more times than not when she felt like he didn’t have her best interests in mind or that he was being overly demanding. Sometimes, the punishments were harsher and hurt more than they should have, and they were for the slightest infractions. Yes, he was a sadist and she knew this, but