Plain Peace (A Daughters of the Promise Novel) Read Online Free PDF

over and shove him, smack him on the back . . . something . . . to snap him out of this depression he was in. Instead, she eased into the covers, snuggled up against him, and draped one arm across his waist. When he tensed up, she moved over and put some distance between them. Hurt and anger wrapped around her so tightly she almost couldn’t breathe. Didn’t her husband understand that Leah’s passing was hard on all of them? How could he just detachhimself from life like this? He wouldn’t have allowed another member of the family to behave like this if the circumstances of the accident were different.
    Cora had told him repeatedly that he was not responsible for their daughter’s death. “This was God’s will,” she’d told him many times. “As awful as it is, we must go on.”
    But John couldn’t seem to get past it. She’d hoped he would be better, a bit back to his old self, once they’d distanced themselves from Middlefield. Leaving family and friends behind had been difficult, but staying had been impossible. The memory of Leah dying in front of all of them on their own farm was too much to bear, especially as spring neared and the prospect of plowing loomed.
    The Zooks had agreed to plow and plant before leaving this farm—a true blessing. None of them, John especially, wanted to go anywhere near a plow this year.
    Cora pulled her knees to her chest beneath the sheet, tucked her head, and cried the way she did most nights, her body trembling, her heart broken. Please roll over and hold me, John. Comfort me .
    It took all of her daytime strength to be strong for her grieving children, but shouldn’t she be able to rely on her husband for comfort? He was the man of the household, but sometimes she could barely stand to be in the same bed with him. And that was confusing.
    In her mind she knew her husband wasn’t responsible for Leah’s death. It was God’s will to take their eldest daughter home at the tender age of twenty. But when the lights were out, when John was cold and distant, and when her own grief overwhelmed her . . . it was John she blamed.

3
    S UNDAY MORNING A NNA DIDN ’ T THINK WORSHIP would end soon enough. She stared straight ahead throughout the service without hearing much of what her grandfather or the other ministers had to say. Instead, she spent her time wondering how many people in the barn disliked her grandfather as much as Rubin and Ben did.
    Without moving her head, she glanced to her left toward Sarah Jane Miller. Did Sarah Jane really believe that Daadi was responsible for her stepmother’s death? Lizzie was sick for a long time, and Anna didn’t think that anything her grandfather had done would have made a difference one way or another. But apparently others didn’t feel the same way. Anna’s heart hurt to think members of their district thought so unkindly of her grandfather. He was too strict. That was true. But he was also a loving man trying to do what he believed was right in God’s eyes.
    Twice during the service she caught the new fellow, Jacob Hostetler, staring at her. She knew it was because of her display the day before after the volleyball game. Jacob probably thought she was childish, running off and crying like that. But Ben and Rubin had said cruel things, things Anna had a hard time shaking.
    She allowed herself a quick glance at Jacob. Their eyes met, andshe thought she saw the hint of a smile. Why? Someone who looked like Jacob could have anyone he wanted in their district. Someone beautiful like Emma.
    Anna pulled her eyes away, but when she looked back at Jacob a few moments later, his gaze was still fixed on her, and this time he did smile. Her heart raced as she quickly looked away, not wanting to get her hopes up that someone like Jacob might be interested in her. Maybe he felt sorry for her, after hearing all the things that Ben and Rubin had said, then seeing her run off crying. That was it. Pity.
    She lifted her chin, pressed her lips