Pink Wellies and Flat Caps Read Online Free PDF Page B

rim.
    ‘Your r ésumé is impeccable, outstanding in fact. I can’t help wondering why the erm …’ she clicks her fingers.
    ‘NHS,’ I offer at the same time that a waiter materialises.
    ‘Ah, yes that’s it. Oh, we are fine Chester thank you,’ she says dismissing him.
    ‘Why these NHS people are letting you go so easily.’
    I take a bite of my scone and feel like I have died and gone to heaven. How can anything taste so good? I decide to enjoy this first and then ask about the pay and the corgis and all the rest. She waits patiently as I sip my tea which, by the way, is outstanding indeed.
    ‘The thing is, I return to Sydney in just under forty-eight hours, so if we could sign the contract today ...’
    ‘But don’t you have other people to consider?’
    She huffs and waves a hand before leaning across to take a sandwich. I have to admit this is doing wonders for my confidence but it all seems a little too unreal to be true. I bet the pay is shocking. That’s it, the farmhouse will be like a mansion and my room so huge that they will feel that is payment enough.
    ‘The salary wasn’t mentioned in the advertisement. I was wondering …’
    ‘How much were you earning with the RSPCA?’
    Well I know some of our patients are like animals but that is taking things a bit far.
    ‘The NHS,’ I correct.
    She sighs.
    ‘NSPCC, NHS, they all do good works do n’t they? So what were you on? A thousand a week?’
    A thousand a week, is this woman insane?
    ‘Well, it was more like two thousand a month but I’ve recently had to take a pay cut …’
    She stares wide -eyed at me.
    ‘We’ll pay you a salary of eight hundred pounds a month, with accommodation and food included. Is that enough?’
    She looks at me earnestly. I sense another waiter at my side and lean back so he can refill my teapot. Eight hundred a month with no rent, bills or food? Blimey, I’d be quids in.
    ‘What about the corgis?’ I ask, returning her earnest look. There is something very suspicious about all this. She squints at me.
    ‘The corgis?’
    ‘Do I have to look after them?’
    She looks thoughtful and spoons a little cream onto her scone.
    ‘Do you like corgis? We can certainly get some if that’s what you want.’
    That’s it. I will kill Georgie and Cas. What bastards. I’ve a good mind to order another tea and tell them to take it to the homeless on the streets. There’s a joke and there’s a joke.
    ‘So, how much did they pay you? God, they’ve got more money than sense those two. Where did they hire you from? You’re bloody good, I’ll give you that. What are you, some out of work actress that Casper hired on the cheap? I don’t believe those two. Honestly, like I seriously haven’t got enough on my plate with Charlie and everything else. I should have known.’
    Her eyes widen.
    ‘I’m sorry Alice, I’m not quite sure I know what we are talking about now.’
    ‘Georgie and Cas, did they put you up to this? It’s okay, I know it’s not your fault and that you’re just doing your job … I should have known that email was a fake. I mean, nobody would have a ridiculously stupid name like Lady Fairfax-Mason would they?’
    She smiles. Chester is suddenly standing by our table and she hands him a key card.
    ‘Be a sweetheart and fetch my passport from my room would you please? Miss Lane is under some misapprehension that I am not who I say I am.’
    Oh shit. Chester takes the card, his expression impassive. Without another word she finishes her tea and gestures for me to do the same. The pianist has stopped and the uncomfortable silence between us is unbearable. Chester returns with the said passport and hands it to me.
    ‘It would be rather an elaborate joke if we also had a forged passport don’t you think?’
    I feel my face growing hot and wish the floor would open up and swallow me. I can almost hear Karen’s voice saying Honestly, I’m not being funny but what are you like Alice? I close my eyes in