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happened down below too.
    So I couldn’t lie to her. “If we found a female in the tunnels who was good only for breeding … if she fought that role, the Hunters would’ve cut her throat and left her for the Freaks. The enclave wouldn’t have wasted resources training her. So, no, we wouldn’t have beaten you, Tegan. My people would’ve killed you.”
    Her breath caught. “Then it’s a good thing I didn’t end up down below.”
    “It is, actually.” Because it was unlikely she’d have survived the tunnels long enough to run into one of our patrols. It still amazed me that Fade had done so.
    I could see her struggling with the revelation, hands clenched on the edge of the counter where we’d stacked the doctor’s clean implements. “But … you’re not like the rest of the Hunters, then. You protected me.”
    “That was after I left the enclave.”
    “So you’re saying you’d have killed me. You , Deuce.” Tegan met my gaze, her brown eyes begging for a denial.
    I was about to destroy all her illusions. “If Silk ordered me to. I’d have felt bad about it, but I would have obeyed. Back then, I thought they knew more than me. Until a certain point, you know only what you’re taught.”
    With a pained wrench, I remembered the blind brat who had come from Nassau begging for help. Fade and I carried him back with us to College, but once the elders heard his message, they had no further use for him. I hadn’t wielded the blade that slit his throat, but I gave the boy to the Hunter who did. His death could be attributed to my silence—and so I couldn’t let her idealize me. Though I’d learned better since I came Topside, it didn’t mean I was a good person or instinctively kind. In fact, I had spent years battling the idea that I was too soft to make it as a Huntress. In many cases, I saw compassion as weakness.
    “Is that why you like Stalker?” Her expression twisted as though the words left a sour taste in her mouth.
    I lifted my shoulders in a shrug. “I understand him. We share common goals.”
    “He’s like you,” she said then.
    “More than you are,” I admitted. “Stalker and I came up with other ideas of right and wrong, different from what I see in Salvation. And, yes, the enclave did a lot of things that I’d fix if I could. At the time, I didn’t know any better … but I’m teachable. I think Stalker is too.”
    “You’ll forgive me if I’m not in a hurry to befriend him,” she muttered.
    “I don’t expect you to. You two have history … bad history. He reminds you of the worst time in your life.”
    “So do you,” she said softly.
    Oh. That hurt, more because it was an unexpected blow. “I’m sorry. I didn’t realize. Is that why—”
    “It’s easier to be around the other girls. They didn’t see me at my weakest. They don’t know everything that’s happened to me, and I’d like to keep it that way. I hope you won’t tell them either.”
    “Of course I won’t. And I won’t visit again, if it bothers you.” I kept my face still and calm, my Huntress expression, and it didn’t reveal any of my pain.
    In Salvation, it seemed like I had nobody but Stalker and Longshot. Fade didn’t talk to me unless I needed saving. The brats at school thought I was crazy and they treated me accordingly … and now this from Tegan. At least you’re safe, I thought. At least you have enough to eat.
    “I need some time. I do appreciate everything you’ve done for me. I just—”
    “Want to settle in?” I suggested, not showing how I felt. “Make new friends?”
    She nodded, visibly relieved. “I’m glad you understand.”
    “I do. I’ll be going, then.” And I wouldn’t come back until she came looking for me. Not out of injured pride, either. A true friend would rank Tegan’s welfare above her own loneliness.
    She didn’t stop me from leaving. Outside the Tuttle place, the weather had turned as the sun fell toward the horizon. Light streaked the sky in