next California bishop, which means he’ll be
head of the Senate eventually, maybe even the first Anglicant president. David thinks if I marry him, I’ll be set for life. Warren isn't
crazy about the idea, though, so maybe I can get him to help me persuade Dad
that it's a bad idea.” Sure, and then I can convince Dad that even though I'm
queer as a three-dollar bill, I'm still his beloved son and deserve his
respect. I feel sick. “They were matched. Warren and David.”
“Wow.” Andi shakes her head. “I knew they did it in the big
political families, but you guys…why?”
“David wants me taken care of, and I guess it
would set him up too. And once I turn eighteen, he can’t legally make me do it,
so time is running out. But now…I mean, how can I marry somebody, knowing what
I am? Andi , I can't be a Perp. It means I’m mentally
unstable, diseased, dangerous. This is going to ruin my life.”
She nods slowly, then says, “Well, maybe not.”
“How can it not
ruin my life? My choices are that I can lie about what I am and marry somebody
I don’t love, or I can be hospitalized for mental illness and deviant sexual
behavior. How is any of that not about
my life being ruined?” I slam my hand down on the table, and it throbs with
pain. It feels good. It makes me forget, for a nanosecond.
“Let me think
for a minute.” She sits on the bench, stares at the dirty cement floor of the
picnic shelter. “We need a plan of action.”
“How about we
run away and join the circus? I can be the sideshow freak and you can sweep up
elephant poop or something.”
“Not helping.”
She sighs and frowns at me with sad brown eyes. “On one hand, I think you
should avoid her at all costs. But then I think…I think you’re going to have to
see her again. If you do, maybe you'll find out that it's nothing after all.
Or...” We both knew where that “or” was going, and it was not a happy place.
“How do we do
that? How do we see her?” Part of me feels electric at the thought of seeing
her again. I know that part is trouble. But…almost as if I know it in my bones,
I know I will have to see her.
We huddle on
the bench, Andi trying to shelter me with her shorter
arm. “She’s visiting. Mom said she was staying with the Goldmans .”
“ Lainie Goldman is the head of the local Perp League.” Great. “Well, I guess I could go to a meeting. Wonder if they'd be
able to tell? Do they have Perp -sniffing dogs or
anything?”
Andi laughs, then shrugs into me with her shoulder. “Don't
worry about that. I'll go instead. They meet for brunch at noon on Mondays—”
“That’s today!”
“Yes, genius.
So, I'll introduce myself, or get Sheila to do it, and then get the girl to
meet me for coffee. You can then conveniently show up.”
“I'd sort of
like to go to the Perp meeting.” After saying the
word several times, it is starting to feel more comfortable, like a pair of
shoes that pinched at first but are starting to wear in. “I'd like to know what
they do. Do you know?”
Andi starts to speak, but frowns and stops herself. “I
don't really know what they do, actually. I've never been to a meeting, and all
I've ever heard Sheila talk about is how they're just a bunch of bitter bitches
who don't get enough sex.”
“She said that?”
“Well, she
didn't know I was listening,” Andi says, grinning.
A thought pops
into my head, a radical thought. “Have you ever questioned the whole
anti-Perpendicular thing? I mean, I know why we’re supposed to reform them,
what the Church teaches and all that. But…have you ever thought it was…I don’t
know…stupid?”
Andi shrugs. “I never really thought about it. But I guess…it’s just not normal, and it’s
against God’s word and all that.” She glances at me. “I never knew one, so it
wasn't something that I really ever worried about.” We stare silently at the
brown grass.
“It’s in the
Constitution. It says right there that