One Foot in the Grave: An Almost Zombie Tale Read Online Free PDF

around ten years old. Didn’t that have to do with Salem, or the Puritans, or something?
    “Those women weren’t witches. The Witch Trials were nothing more than maligned women being drowned and hung for man’s ignorance.”
    I swivel the computer chair back around so I can look at her without straining my neck. “Were you—were you one?” I inch the chair back toward the computers. If she’s one of those witches, she’s really old…and probably really dangerous.
    “I wasn’t one of those women, no.”
    Lydia answers the exact question I asked, but I’m not stupid. I rephrase the question. “Were you alive back then?”
    “Oh honey, I’ve been alive for years. ” She laughs and sits down in the chair next to me. “But yes, to answer your question, I was. However, I will not tell you about my past, so please don’t ask. What happened back then wasn’t pretty and I have no desire to relive it. Besides, you’re getting distracted. As I said, everyone in the sanctuary is a half. They’ve all struggled with finding themselves. You’re not alone. Not anymore.”
    “How’m I supposed to ‘find myself’ when I don’t even understand what I am?”
    “Come back into the sanctuary with me,” Lydia says. “Meet some of the others. Who knows, you might wind up with some friends.”
    I think of the girl with the cat-slit eyes. “Doubt it.” But I follow her out of the office, because I’m already here and why not?
    It figures. The first person to come up to us is the fang guy. I try to smile, but I’m pretty sure it looks more like a grimace than anything else.
    “It’s okay, Isis,” Lydia says.
    I’m not reassured. Especially now that I know those weird canines he has are the result of being a monster. Excuse me. Half a monster. Like that makes it so much better.
    He grins at me. All the rest of his teeth are normal looking. He’d even be kind of cute if it wasn’t for the fact that when his mouth closes, his fangs rest on his lower lip. “You look kind of freaked out,” he holds out his right hand. “I’m Daniel.”
    Oh. Crap. I’ve left my hand sitting on the left side of the keyboard in the priest’s office. “Ummm…Hi,” I mumble. “Sorry about my hand.”
    He glances down at my stump. “Oh, wow. So…what are you?”
    I frown. “Excuse me?”
    “You know…we’re all halves here. I’m a half-vampire. What’re you?”
    “Z—z—zombie,” I stutter, wondering if I’m really having this conversation.
    “Cool, so you’re an undead, too.”
    Wait. “I’m a what ?”
    Daniel grins again. “You know. Undead. Like…not alive.”
    I blink. Weirdest. Conversation. Ever. But he’s been nice so far and I like him. “So what’s the deal with the cat-eyed chick? Is she undead, too?”
    He flushes. “You mean the half-fae? Nah, she’s not undead. That’s Noelle.”
    “Yeah, she’s—interesting.”
    “Like a fungus? Plan on putting me in a petri dish, maybe?”
    Crap. Of course she’s behind me. I breathe deeply; in through the nose, out through the mouth, just like Mom taught me. I turn. “That’s not what I meant,” I start, but she doesn’t let me finish. Not by a long shot.
    “What’s your malfunction? Why are you here, anyway? Slumming?”
    “Noelle, she’s new,” Daniel says. “Give her a break, why don’t you?”
    “Why should I?” Boy, she’s got enough anger to keep an entire city lit.
    “Look,” I say. “I don’t know what I did to set you off, but I’m really sorry, okay? Whatever it is, I didn’t mean it.”
    She stares at me for a long minute. “That’s just about the worst apology I’ve never heard.”
    Before I can say anything else, the green haired half-fae storms out of the church, slamming the doors shut behind her.
    “Wow. Is she always so volatile?” I’d rather use another word, but my mom’s always telling me that ladies don’t swear.
    Daniel shrugs. “It’s Noelle. You get used to her.”
    Yeah. I don’t see that