On the Come Up Read Online Free PDF

some girl’s shoe. She cringed at the thought. The girl had reared back, glaring.
Bitch, watch where you walking
. The fella next to her snickering.
Peewee like you, why ain’t you home. Where your mother at
.

    A wash of anxiety woke her. She felt Blessed next to her in the bed and she stayed still, laying on her side, staring at the wall. Thinking, almost thirteen and you sleeping with your mother.
    AnnMarie rolled over. She felt her mother’s hand against her side, felt the heat breathing off her skin. She used to love it, sleeping with her mother. Those first months in Far Rock, they’d had no furniture, just a chair somebody had left behind. At night, they made a bed outta blankets. AnnMarie’d crawl in next to her mother, listening for a long time until her breath evened out. Then she’d lift her mother’s arm, set it over her waist, and the shouts and clamor rising from the street below faded into a vague and distant preoccupation.
    In the living room, Carlton and Carlotta sat on the couch, eating cereal.
    Well, ain’t you grown, Carlton said with a fake-ass smile.
    What you mean, she asked, going past him into her bedroom.
    When’d you come home last night?
    None a your business
, AnnMarie thought, pulling open her drawers, digging around for a change of clothes. She heard him laugh, his eyes on her as she went into the bathroom. She locked the door, wondering how bad she gonna get it. Never knew with Blessed. Sometime she don’t say nothing. She stood under the warm water. Sang the Brandy song she’d been working on. Sang the entire verse without stopping, then sang it again. She liked how her voice sound in the bathroom. Bouncing off the tile. Got mad reverb.
    When she got out, her mother was awake, the two of them still on the couch, watching TV. AnnMarie stood in the doorway and held her breath, watching Blessed’s face contort into a frown asshe struggled to open a pill container. But all her mother said was, Open this for me, AnnMarie.
    AnnMarie slipped across the room, took the pill bottle and unscrewed the lid.
    This for your blood pressure? You know you got to eat food with it, Ma …
    Her mother didn’t answer, just took the pill and swallowed.
    Pass me my Percocet.
    AnnMarie hesitated. Percocet first thing in the morning. Her mother be sleeping before she wake. They used to do things. Go to the rec center. Cook food. Her mother humming a little tune. AnnMarie leaned over to look at the labels. Pills for cholesterol, pills for pain, tremor pills, depression pills. Pills for the heart.
    Ma, why you need this, first thing in the morning.
    Just open it for me, AnnMarie, my leg painin’ me.
    AnnMarie opened the pill bottle, then passed it to her mother, sitting down next to her on the bed. Her mother struggled to get the pills out with her shaky fingers but AnnMarie didn’t move to help.
    Instead, she bent and picked Blessed’s wig up off the floor, bits of lint and a snarl forming. You want me to brush it out for you?
    Just set it down, AnnMarie, her mother said sharply, and get out me room. Soon as me get me Medicaid fixed, Miss Jessica be back. She know exactly how me like things.
    Her mother’s accent flaring. What you got to be angry for, AnnMarie thought. Acting like a invalid. Fuck that. She stood up and stepped through the doorway, saying, Fine, I hope you get your Medicaid fix. Miss Jessica come back, all y’alls can have a fucking party.
    You hear that, Carlton. You see how she talk?
    I hear it, Miss Blessed. Back home she get a cut ass for that. A cut ass.
    AnnMarie scowled. Sitting there like he some kinda crowned prince. She said, Who you. Who the fuck are you?
    Then Blessed was trying to stand, her good eye glaring. What you say? What did me hear you say? You must want me to box you down. That what you want?
    AnnMarie cut her eyes away but kept her mouth shut.

5
    Her birthday came and went with the blow of a candle. August became September and there was no stopping school coming