and sat my ass down on the workout mat. Otis trotted over from his corner, a tennis ball in his mouth. He always knew he could bother me when I was taking a break from the weights.
I tossed it across the room and watched him slide over the tile as he snapped his jaws at the bouncing ball. I glanced over at the wall of mirrors to look at myself. Clint’s comment about looking good naked had me worried. Was that why Steph had pulled away from me so quickly? No. I looked fine. Sure, I wasn’t as rock hard as I had been in high school, but I wasn’t dog food, either.
I couldn’t let her make me self-conscious. If she didn’t want to be with me, then that was all there was to it. I shouldn’t beat myself up over it. I’d gotten her in bed, anyway. Hell, I’d gotten her in bed twice. That should have been enough to sate whatever stupid urge it was that made her face come up whenever I closed my eyes.
But I’d fucked her silly, and I still felt like it wasn’t enough. What the hell was wrong with me?
“Lucas? Hello?”
“Huh?” I said, snapping back to reality.
“How about a double date tomorrow?” Jake asked. “You, me, Steph and Lacey.”
“What about me?” Clint said.
“You’re not allowed,” I said automatically. “You always bring your groupies, and they’re always dumb as hell.”
“But they’re cute,” Clint said.
“No,” I said. “And I don’t think Steph wants to date me.”
“You could marry her,” Jake said.
“Would you listen to this guy!” Clint said. “Marry her!”
“You think I should listen to him?” I joked.
“No!” Clint said. “As soon as he gets engaged, he wants everyone to get handcuffed along with him.”
“Handcuffs? I don’t need to know these details of your sex life,” I said.
“I’ve never seen you so worked up about a girl,” Jake said.
“Me?” I was aware that my voice was rising, but I couldn’t stop it. “I’m not worked up!”
“So worked up,” Clint said. “Would she even want to marry you?”
“Marry me? Who said anything about me getting married? Why are we talking about this all of a sudden?” I stood up, feeling the blood rush to my head.
“Your mom can’t stop talking about it,” Jake said. “You want to settle down sometime, right?”
“No! I don’t want to get married! Stop talking like you’re a group of teenage girls!” Even as I said it, though, I couldn’t stop my mind from unspooling a reel of images: Steph taking my hand just to hold it; Steph curled up against me, naked and sleepy; Steph in a wedding dress; me taking off Steph’s wedding dress…
I shook my head. It was impossible.
But Clint only laughed.
“Come on. It’s not like you have to stop sleeping around. Having a wife will be the perfect way to get your mom off your back. You can still have chicks on the side if you want. Belle will always be around if you need a quick fuck. And that other girl, I forget her name…”
While Clint’s voice trailed off, I swallowed back the lump in my throat. The thought of being with Belle again—or any other woman, for that matter— “I don’t think that’s Lucas’s problem,” Jake said.
“Oh?” I snapped back. “What’s my problem?”
“Your problem,” Jake said, “is that you can’t get her out of your head.”
“That’s ridiculous.” Otis nudged my hand and I took the tennis ball, throwing it absentmindedly. It went splashing into the pool and Otis went splashing right after it.
“I’m right, aren’t I?”
“I bet you a million dollars you can’t get that girl to marry you, anyway,” Clint said.
“I’d take that bet,” Jake said. “I think he could do it.”
“Why are you even betting on this?!” I said. “It’s not going to happen!”
“Chicken,” Clint said.
“Goddammit, stop talking about marriage proposals,” I said. I threw Otis’s ball again. It bounced off the far wall and landed on top of the lifting cage. Otis ran over and sat whining at the
Marina Dyachenko, Sergey Dyachenko