other Mary, the one who appears in the pictures at the foot of the holy cross, beside the immaculate one.
According to tradition, that other Mary, Mary Magdalene, was a whore and became a saint.
Believers humiliate her by offering forgiveness.
RESURRECTION OF MARY
Mary was reborn in Chiapas.
It was announced by an Indian from the town of Simojovel, a cousin of hers, and by a hermit who was unrelated and lived under a tree in Chamula.
And in the town of Santa Marta Xolotepec, Dominica López was harvesting corn when she saw her. The mother of Jesus asked her to build her a chapel because she was tired of sleeping in the woods. Dominica paid heed, but in a few days the bishop turned up and arrested her along with Mary and all her followers.
Then Mary escaped from jail and went to the town of Cancuc and spoke out of the mouth of a girl who was also named Mary.
The Tzetzal Mayas never forgot what she said. She spoke in their language and in a hoarse voice she ordered:
that women should not deny their bodily desires, because these cheered her;
that women who wished to get married to other men should do so, because
marriages performed by Spanish priests were no good;
and that the prophecy that the yoke would be thrown off and lands and
freedom restored had come to pass, and there was no longer any need for
tribute or king or bishop or high mayor.
And the Council of Elders heard her and obeyed. And in the year 1712, thirty-two indigenous towns rose up in arms.
ORIGIN OF SANTA CLAUS
The first rendering of Santa Claus, published in 1863 in Harper’s of New York, showed a hefty little gnome entering a chimney. He issued from the hand of the artist Thomas Nast, vaguely inspired by the legend of Saint Nicholas.
Christmas of 1930 saw Santa Claus working for Coca-Cola. Before then he did not wear a suit and generally preferred to wear blue or green. The artist Haddon Sundblom dressed him in the company colors, bright red with white piping, and gave him the features familiar to us all. Every child’s friend has a white beard, laughs all the time, travels by sleigh, and is so plump that no one can figure out how he gets down the world’s chimneys loaded with presents and carrying a Coke in each hand.
Neither can anyone figure out what he has to do with Christ.
ORIGIN OF HELL
The Catholic Church invented hell and also invented the devil.
The Old Testament makes no mention of the perpetual barbecue, neither do its pages feature an appearance by the monster reeking of sulfur, who carries a trident and sports horns and a tail, claws and hooves, goat’s legs and dragon’s wings.
But the Church asked itself: what will become of reward without punishment? What will become of obedience without fear?
And it wondered: what will become of God without the devil? What will become of good without evil?
And the Church concluded that the threat of hell is more effective than the promise of heaven, and from then on ministers and holy fathers have terrorized us with sermons about torture in the fiery abyss where the evil one reigns.
In the year 2007, Pope Benedict XVI confirmed it:
“There is a hell. And it is eternal.”
PRISCILLIAN
And the time of the catacombs ended.
In the Coliseum, the Christians ate the lions.
Rome became the global capital of the faith and the Catholic religion became the official religion of the empire.
And in the year 385, when the Church condemned Bishop Priscillian and his followers, it was the Roman emperor who killed them as heretics.
Heads rolled.
The Christians led by Bishop Priscillian had been guilty:
they danced and sang and celebrated darkness and fire,
they turned the mass into a pagan festival from Galicia, the suspicious
land where Priscillian was born,
they lived in community and in poverty,
they repudiated the alliance of the Church with the powers that be,
they condemned slavery,
and they allowed women to preach, as priests.
HYPATIA
“She’ll go off with anybody,” they
William K. Klingaman, Nicholas P. Klingaman
John McEnroe;James Kaplan