Mark Schweizer - Liturgical 12 - The Cantor Wore Crinolines Read Online Free PDF

also paid for.”
    It might be said by some that Bev Greene was bitter, since she had been fired by the Reverend Dr. Rosemary Pepperpot-Cohosh from her position as church administrator within a couple months of the new priest’s arrival. And that now she took a certain pleasure in seeing her fall from grace.
    “It’s not that I’m bitter and that I take any satisfaction in seeing Mother P’s fall from grace,” Bev said, then offered us all a big smile. “Well, I take that back. I do. Does that make me a terrible person?”
    “Yep,” said Cynthia. “It really does. But I’ll pray for you.”
    “Well, we got most of the money back,” said Meg. “Except what she gave that Nicaraguan gigolo.
    “She’s back working at Walmart,” added Bev, “or so I’ve heard.”
    I nodded. “I think that’s right. Herb left and took a campus ministry position back in Iowa. I think Rosemary is up in Roanoke.”
    “Did Enrique go with her?” asked Nancy. “I noticed that his workout studio is closed up.”
    “I have no idea,” I said. “I doubt it though. A dumpy, middle-aged, ex-Lutheran, Episcopal priest from Iowa now working as a sales associate at Walmart might not be the catch that a young, fit, attractive … “
    “ Highly attractive,” interrupted Jennifer.
    “Highly,” agreed Nancy.
    “ … Highly attractive personal trainer with an expiring green card might want.”
    “She was quite smitten,” said Meg. “It was true love. Agape love. She told me so right before she left.”
    “I’m sure it was,” said Bev with a smile. “The trip to Nicaragua in October was to begin building her new church. She was sure Bishop O’Connell was going to give her the blessing of the diocese. What was she thinking?”
    “She took the money down there with her?” asked Kent.
    “A hundred thousand dollars in cash,” said Bev. “Enrique had arranged for her to make a downpayment to the builder. She was stopped when she tried to enter the country. Customs called the feds in and she was sent back to the states immediately.”
    Kent nodded and sipped his beer. “And Enrique?”
    “He came back with her on the same plane. I guess he thought he could still make the deal work out, but once the customs officials got involved, the church was contacted immediately.”
    “How did she get all that cash?” asked Jennifer.
    Meg shrugged. “It was easy, actually, and our fault. You know that St. Barnabas has a trust fund that Gaylen set up when we got the settlement from the bank?”
    “Sure,” said Jennifer. “Several million bucks.”
    “Right,” said Meg. “Well, it’s set up in several accounts, one of them being a discretionary account that the priest can use. We went to computer banking a few years ago when the bank started offering on-line services. What we didn’t realize, or even think about, was that since Rosemary was listed as a signer on her discretionary account, was that she could also transfer funds between any of the accounts. We don’t know when she discovered that she could do that, or even if Señor Enrique figured it out during pillow talk after one of their ‘training sessions’, but she transferred the money, withdrew the cash, and took off for Central America all within twenty-four hours. Of course, they’d been planning it for a while.”
    “Wow,” said Pete.
    “We plugged that hole pretty quickly, I can tell you,” said Meg. “It won’t be happening again. The clergy will have no access to anything but their own account and even then our accountant will monitor it.”
    “On the upside,” said Bev. “Our full-time interim priest arrived in town this afternoon. He’ll be taking the service tomorrow morning.” She turned to me and said sweetly, “Will you be attending, Hayden?”
    “As you know,” I answered, “I’m on sabbatical from St. Barnabas.”
    I had decided, after Christmas, that it was time for me to take a few months off. I’d been going to church mad, leaving