Mama Gets Hitched Read Online Free PDF Page B

brave!”
    I smiled modestly, glancing at Maddie just in time to see her roll her eyes.
    Once we were back on the highway, my sister turned in her seat to the rear of the Jeep. Lifting the air-holed lid off a plastic pail, she peeked inside at the snake.
    “Oh, c’mon, Mace.” She snorted. “You took that poor woman’s money for this? It’s still a baby!”
    “Not technically, Maddie. Two feet is definitely an adult.”
    “So that works out to, what? Forty dollars a foot?”
    “Fifty. Not including the tip.”
    “You’re shameless, Sister!”
    “Hey, she had a problem, I was the solution. That’s business. Besides, that gal with her white slacks and manicured nails is not about to go crawling around after a snake. To her, it’s worth what she paid, maybe more, to not have to do it herself.”
    “So you’re really performing a public service.”
    “That’s right.”
    “Yeah, and Donald Trump just wants the best for all those people he fires on TV. Be sure to take that creature in the pail far away from my house. And, by the way, Moneybags, you’re buying the pizza for Mama’s house tonight.”
    Maddie and I passed the ranch for sale again on our way back to town. Cattle herded together in stands of sabal palms, seeking shade from the midday sun. I envied them, in a way. They had no concept of the future, no foreboding about the development creeping inland from the coasts, threatening to ruin the ranches-and-rodeo lifestyle that makes Himmarshee unique.
    “Look at that sign,” I said to Maddie. “It’s a shame, huh?”
    “Sure is,” she said. “Looks like they’re aiming to build a new housing development when what we could really use is a Super Walmart.”
    I looked at her.
    “What?” Maddie said.
    “Are you sure we’re sisters?”
    “Shopping is not a sin, Mace. And, yes, I’m sure. I remember Mama saying you were growing in her tummy, and then Daddy and her bringing you home from the hospital. Everyone said how adorable you were with those big blue eyes and that shock of black hair.”
    I worked my fingers through my hair. It was still black, whipped by the wind through the windows into some shocking snarls.
    “My reign as the center of the universe was over.” Maddie shook her head sadly. “And I wasn’t even four.”
    “You need to get over that sibling rivalry, Sister. It was thirty-two years ago.”
    She sniffled, playing it up. “Early traumas aren’t easily forgotten.”
    Then her face turned grave. “Speaking of trauma, I didn’t even ask you how you felt about finding Ronnie this morning. That must have been horrible.”
    An image of Mama’s neighbor and all that blood forced itself into my mind. I gazed ahead at the road, keeping my eyes focused on the center yellow line.
    “Yeah,” I finally said. “It was hard. And I felt so sorry for Alice, too. I’m glad Carlos wouldn’t let her see Ronnie. She should remember her husband the way he was.”
    The radio was playing a commercial for the Home on the Range Feed Supply and Clothing Emporium. I switched to a station giving the weather forecast. High humidity, temperatures in the 90s, and we were barely into June. Welcome to middle Florida, where the nearest ocean breeze is sixty miles away.
    “What do you suppose that weird look meant that Alice gave C’ndee?” I asked.
    Maddie was punching up Dr. Laura’s station again, even though it was my Jeep, and she knew how I felt about that show. She lifted a shoulder in a shrug.
    “Don’t know. C’ndee’s from New Jersey. Maybe Alice doesn’t like her on principle.”
    “No, it was more than that. It was like Alice knew her, and she wanted C’ndee to know she knew her. It was like she was sending some kind of signal.”
    “Maybe it was disapproval,” Maddie said. “Alice is pretty modest, and did you see that skirt C’ndee had on?”
    “Oh, yeah. And you know what Aunt Ida would have said about that skirt …” I began.
    She finished, “ ‘Girl, go put on