Loving Ean (The Fae Guard Book 2) Read Online Free PDF

to focus on a relationship with you.” There is a tight undercurrent in his words, if I didn’t know better; I would think he was lying. But, Ean would never cross that line, especially not after what happened. “I need to put everything into my job; I have too many people counting on me to add you into the mix.”
    My heart prickles with tiny shards of pain, but I remain calm, determined to make him see that his belief is wrong. “We’re fated, Ean.” I step toward him and he practically flies up from the couch and across the room.
    “You know as well as I do that I have a choice. Being fated does not bind me to you without my consent, and I’m taking a different path, choosing not to be with you.”
    The prickles become knives and my heart is sliced and shredded. But the pieces are still clinging together with my last vestiges of hope. “Ean, I understand what you’ve been through, we can work through this.”
    I didn’t think it was possible, but Ean’s face hardens further, the blue of his eyes taking on a slivery glint, like steel. He barks out a sound that I suppose was intended to be a laugh, but there is no humor in it. “Laila, how could you possibly have any understanding of what has happened?” He shakes his head and his gaze turns cynical. “You were in the field for what—a decade?”
    Another slice.
    “You’re an incredible instructor, Laila. They say you’re the best we’ve had in centuries.” His eyes soften just the smallest amount, but it doesn’t instill any optimism, he has more to say and the knives are waiting to make their final move. “Being in the training facility and preparing Fae for the world they must face is nothing like being out there. You couldn’t handle the harsh demands on your body and your mind. You are everything that is sweet and good, Laila. You can’t help me because there is no way for you to comprehend what I’m dealing with.”
    Slice.
    “Without the power and strength to be out there, fighting the evil instead of the idea of it, you are vulnerable. I can’t protect you and do my job. You’re not what I need. And certainly, the last thing you need is to be tainted by someone so jaded and broken as me.”
    The last knife is shoved into the muscle hanging so precariously and my heart stops beating. I stop living because my world has just been shattered. He thinks I’m weak, that I don’t have what it takes to be his partner, his fate. How could I not have realized all the subtle signs that he believed I was fragile? In this moment, without the sound of my pulse, I gain a clarity that wasn’t there before. I see all the evidence in his actions, ones I assumed were because I was precious to him rather than the reality, which is that he sees me as breakable. I wonder if I’ve done the right thing with my life. If I’d turned down the opportunity to teach, would I be enough for Ean now? Would he see me as an equal? The thoughts are quickly wiped away. No, I’m doing what I was destined for. I have never second guessed my decision and I won’t let Ean fill my mind with doubt, however unintentionally.
    I don’t even entertain the idea of arguing with him and trying to prove his ridiculous assumptions false, I can see that it would be useless. He won’t let me in, so he’ll have to help himself, find his own way out of the guilt-ridden existence he has banished himself to. I simply nod and walk to the door, but before I shut the door behind me, I pause and study Ean. He is no longer standing erect and rigid by the window. His body is slumped and curved into itself, one hand rests on the window for support and his head hangs forward dejectedly.
    “Ean,” I call his name softly and wait for him to turn and lift his eyes, meeting my stare. There is such anguish in them, it grips me tight, flooding my every cell with desolation. I don’t know if it’s because we are fated, or because I am bound to him by my love, but I know that the emotions I’m