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down crazy paths when she was at Indiana University, and after she returned home she determined that she would not pursue guys again. The next time — if God allowed a next time in her life — the guy would pursue her. Like Bailey’s mom had said: “Like a dying man goes after water in a desert.” Until then, she was content to be lonely.
    At least she had been content.
    Seeing Cody on Facebook reminded her that she needed to keep praying. Not only that God would give her contentment in her loneliness, but that He might work a miracle in her life.
    So that someday, somehow, someone might love her.
     

Three
     
    B AILEY’S DOUBTS BURNED THEMSELVES INTO HER HEART AND stayed there while the song on her car radio finished. By then she was at the beach, and like she had hoped, the parking lot was empty. She found a spot, grabbed the new script and a towel from the backseat, and walked toward the nearest pale-blue lifeguard station. Staff wasn’t on duty at this hour. She walked up the stairs and spread her towel across the platform. Hidden from the world, with her back against the tower wall and the ocean spread out before her, Bailey breathed in deep and stared at the water.
    Here it was easy to reflect on the events of the past month. Her uneasy meetings with NTM studios, and a few troubling conversations with Brandon. Assuming West Mark fixed the contract, there was still the issue of Brandon being committed to Los Angeles for the next five years.
    Which brought up another frustration that had surfaced lately. Now that she and Brandon were both living in LA, the paparazzi constantly looked for scandalous stories about them. Headlines at supermarket checkout stands regularly questioned whether Bailey was pregnant or Brandon was cheating on her or she was having a secret long-distance affair with someone back in New York. Brandon was used to it, and to some degree Bailey was too. Most people didn’t believe the garbage they printed, but still it was wearying.
    More days than not she longed for the simplicity of Bloomington, when no one wondered why she was headed into a drugstoreor having a phone conversation while she walked down the street. The insanely busy streets and teeming sidewalks of New York City were relaxing compared to paparazzi-crazy Los Angeles. A friend from the
Hairspray
cast had called last week to inform her that a couple shows were auditioning for dancers in the fall. Six months away, but still … Could Bailey really commit to LA when her heart was so uneasy? All of it left Bailey confused about her feelings for Brandon, and whether everything between them had maybe happened too fast.
    What am I feeling, God? … Help me find the peace I felt a month ago
.
    She exhaled and leaned her head back against the weathered wood. Maybe her whole relationship with Brandon was all a little too easy. The way he’d swept in from the beginning and made her feel loved and cherished and special. Now it was like he took for granted the fact that she’d move to LA permanently or that she could handle the constant throng of photographers capturing their every move. She’d hinted a few times that maybe they should talk, that maybe she’d made the move to LA too quickly. But each time something distracted them. She was beginning to think Brandon simply didn’t want to talk about the possibility that her living in LA might not work out.
    Because they both loved each other so much. That was the one thing she didn’t question.
    The ocean was rougher than usual, white caps bouncing in from the distant horizon. Bailey stared at the water but all she could see was Brandon. The time he surprised her and flew to Indiana to help her pack for New York … the Empire State Building … the carriage rides through the City and seeing him in the front row every night she performed for her last two months on Broadway. The prom on the top of the Kellers’ apartment building. Their Skype dates. She smiled, enjoying the bouquet of