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mainstream came to us.” Later he would tell interviewers that he hated the album, that it was the kind of album he himself would never listen to and that it was “too slick-sounding.” But the poppy hooks were no accident. Nirvana had unstinting creative control over Nevermind. Kurt’s entourage—who knew he listened to his favorite album, Abba Gold: Greatest Hits, almost constantly while touring—were well aware just how absurd his protestations were.
    The most ironic by-product of the album’s success was the acquisition of a brand-new fan base largely consisting of what Kurt would describe as the “stump dumb rednecks that I thought we had left behind in Aberdeen.” Indeed, the crowds at the band’s sold-out concerts were almost indistinguishable from the fans at a Guns n’ Roses concert. So embarrassing was this turn of events that Kurt would use the liner notes of his next album to warn the homo-phobes, the racists and the misogynists in Nirvana’s audience “to leave us the fuck alone.”
    As if to underscore Leland’s claim that his mother didn’t have any use for Kurt until he became famous, Wendy wrote a letter to the local Aberdeen newspaper shortly after Nevermind hit the charts, sounding like a doting mother whose son had just left the nest for the first time. “Kurt, if you happen to read this, we are so proud of you and you are truly one of the nicest sons a mother could have. Please don’t forget to eat your vegetables or brush your teeth and now [that] you have your maid, make your bed.” The irony wasn’t lost on Kurt, who was struck by the hypocrisy of the sudden attention from Wendy and his other relatives, most of whom had wanted nothing to do with him only a few months earlier. He had left Aberdeen and his family behind for good, and no amount of sucking up would make him forget two decades of rejection.
    At the height of his band’s success, Kurt clearly identified with his favorite Beatle, John Lennon, who knew as well as anybody the price of fame. In an interview with Rolling Stone, Kurt talked about this bond with Lennon: “I don’t know who wrote what parts of what Beatles songs, but Paul McCartney embarrasses me. Lennon was obviously disturbed…. I just felt really sorry for him…his life was a prison. He was imprisoned. It’s not fair. That’s the crux of the problem that I’ve had with becoming a celebrity—the way people deal with celebrities.”
    The next chapter in Cobain’s short life was to invite new comparisons between himself and his musical idol. When George Harrison was asked how he first met Yoko Ono, he replied, “I’m not sure. All of a sudden she was just there.” Kurt’s bandmates, Dave Grohl and Krist Novoselic, would tell similar stories in later years about the bleached blonde who started to appear at Kurt’s side shortly after Nevermind was released. Perhaps that’s why Grohl and Novoselic both called her Yoko—at least behind her back.

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    W hen we set out to interview those who might offer us the best insight into the real Courtney Love, we encountered an unusual obstacle. The first two people we contacted said they were in hiding. Each gave us the same explanation: they were “afraid of her.” What made this even more unusual was the fact that these two people were her father and her first husband.
    Now, in the summer of 2003, we are sitting on the outdoor terrace of the Seattle Art Museum with an old friend of Kurt’s who witnessed his relationship with Courtney unfold from its beginnings. After about half an hour of candid memories about her old friend Kurt, captured by our video camera for a potential documentary, the subject turns to Courtney Love. “Tell us about her,” we say. She immediately turns pale. “You expect me to talk about Courtney with the camera running? Do you think I have a death wish?”

    The first time Kurt Cobain spotted Courtney Love, he thought she looked like Nancy Spungen. Courtney liked that. For several