Love Comes Blindly (book 5) (The Fielding Brothers Saga) Read Online Free PDF

“My friend tells me you are young. He also mentioned how lovely you are. I can tell you have a sweet voice, and it makes me curious to know why you are not in London during the season trying to find a husband like most women.”
    She sighed. “Would you believe a few years ago I did that very thing? I wasn’t quite old enough to have my coming out ball, but I was definitely looking for a husband.”
    He relaxed in his wheelchair and crossed his arms over his chest. “Tell me more.”
    She stopped. The rustling of her skirts moved from in back of him to the side. It sounded like she sat on something. Perhaps the garden had stone benches like the ones his brother had at his manor.
    “I didn’t have a very happy life,” she began. “I tried to make those around me miserable because I thought I would feel better about myself. Along my path to self-destruction, I hurt many people. I was not a pleasant person, and due to my mistakes, my family shunned me. Becoming a nun had never crossed my mind, but I had nowhere to go. For months I’d wandered sick and hungry until the Reverend Mother found me and brought me in. That is when I realized God had shown me a new path.”
    Pain edged her voice and the sound made his heart clench. Poor woman. She’d been so young, so alone. He reached his hand toward her, and soft fingers circled his and stroked his palm. Heat grew and spread where her skin touched his.
    “But has God indeed shown you the path you’re supposed to follow?”
    “Yes, I believe He has.”
    “What makes you so certain?”
    “I—I—I fear I shouldn’t say anymore.”
    She tried to remove her hand, but Gregg tightened his grip. “No, please go on. I desperately want to know. If anything, I shall be a good listener since that’s all I can really do now.” He chuckled. “So please, tell me.”
    “Well, if you insist.” She took a deep breath and he heard her exhaled it. “After the Reverend Mother took me in, I discovered I—I—” she paused as her voice broke. She cleared her throat and continued, “I discovered I was in the motherly way.”
    He held his breath, waiting to hear more.
    “I gave birth to a daughter, but she wasn’t strong. Two months later, she…she…died in my arms.”
    Her voice cracked, which made his gut twist. To think this young girl had endured all that. “I’m sorry, Mary. I cannot imagine how devastated you were.”
    “Please, Mr. Fielding. Call me Sister Mary.”
    “Again, forgive me.” He really didn’t want to call her Sister. He wanted to think of her as a real woman, not a nun. The tingles racing through his body reminded him how pleasurable a woman’s touch could be. Would he really respond if she were a real nun? He didn’t think so.
    “At first I thought God was punishing me for all the havoc I’d created in my life, but I soon realized all of this was a blessing in disguise. I wouldn’t have been able to live at the Abbey and raise my daughter. An unwed woman with a child cannot have a normal life. If the baby had lived, both of us would have been scorned for the rest of our lives.”
    “What did the baby’s father think of all this?”
    “He didn’t know…and he wouldn’t have cared.” Her voice was low again, and tight. “He hates me...or the person I was then.”
    “Is he married?”
    “No. He was a bachelor—a rouge, to the fullest.”
    Mary sniffed and he squeezed her cold hand. “What did you name your daughter?”
    “Vivian.”
    “What a lovely name.”
    A few more minutes passed in silence. Then Mary took a deep breath and exhaled it slowly. “Let’s not talk about this anymore. It’s quite depressing.”
    She moved to stand, but he grasped her hand and pulled her back down to the bench. “Mary, thank you for telling me. I feel I know you better now.” He rubbed her soft fingers.
    “Maybe I shouldn’t have told you, but I feel like I know you better, as well.”
    He nodded.
    “And Mr. Fielding?”
    “Yes?”
    “Please