Love and War: The Coltrane Saga, Book 1 Read Online Free PDF Page B

reading poetry and approving menus and giving orders on how I want my house run. I’d have a baby every year like you’d have me do, because I’d have a wet nurse to take care of it.
    “But I don’t have the time to learn about anything else, because all I do is work my fingers to the bone around here. A poor provider you’ve been, John Wright. I’ve had to grovel for every bite rye ever put in my mouth since I married you!”
    Their eyes met and held angrily. John brushed at the tip of his nose with the back of his hand, then tucked both hands into his pockets, as though he were afraid of what might happen if he didn’t confine them.
    “And you’ve been a damned poor wife, Lena.” His voice came out hoarse and rasping. “I know you hurt a lot when Kitty was born, but all women hurt when they have babies. But you thought you were something special, and you didn’t like the pain, so ever since then, you’ve used every excuse you could find to turn me away from you. But you and I both know it’s because you’re not woman enough to try to have another baby!
    “Say it!” His voice rose. “Why don’t you tell the truth for once in your life instead of needling and nagging and lying about me ?”
    Out came his right hand, and he balled it into a fist and brought it crashing down on the table, angry with himself for letting her rile him so, Each time she would start one of her attacks, he would promise himself not to let her make him lose his temper again…and each time he lost all control of his senses. He had never hit her. She had not quite driven him to that point, and he prayed she never would, but his hands trembled with the desire to strike her.
    Lena’s eyes were darting with anger as her tongue pushed against her teeth nervously, anxious to attack. Her body twitched with excitement.
    “How dare you talk to me this way in front of Katherine?” The words came out in a rush. “I wasn’t afraid to have another baby, you old fool. It was the thoughts of your touching me that made me sick. You’re lazy, John Wright…lazy and shiftless, and a nigger-lover to boot! You’re no good, and all our neighbors are calling you ‘white trash’ because of your fool Federalist notions. The truth is—you don’t want war because you’re too big a coward to fight!”
    Kitty’s eyes were on her father, frightened at the way the color was rising in his cheeks above his beard.
    Suddenly, swiftly, he reached down and snatched up the bowl of fish stew sitting in front of him, and, with one swift motion, sent it hurtling through the air to crash and splatter against the far wall of the kitchen. Jumping up, his chair falling with a dull plop onto the clay floor, he towered over Lena, his body almost convulsing in anger.
    “You get out of my sight, woman, or I’ll give you the beating you’re begging for. Don’t say another word to me, or so help me, I think I’ll kill you!”
    Face pinched, knowing she had pushed him as far as she dared, Lena swished from the kitchen and disappeared into the bedroom, slamming the door behind her.
    John picked up his chair and slumped down into it, hand over his chest. Kitty started to get something to clean up the mess from the thrown stew, but she turned to him anxiously instead. “Are you all right? You look funny…” And then her voice broke. “Oh, Poppa, I hate it when you two fight like that!”
    “I know, I know.” He waved a hand in the air for silence, not wanting to hear any admonishment. “It scares me the way she can make me so angry. She makes me lose almost all control, and one day, she’ll bring out the worst…” He shuddered.
    Kitty went about cleaning up the mess from the wall and the floor as John sat in silence. When she finished, he stood up once again and held out his hand to her. “Let’s go out to the barn and take another look at Betsy and the new calf.”
    They walked side by side, hand in hand, across the bare ground. Next spring they would