Losing Me, Finding You Read Online Free PDF

glad you could make it here tonight, Miss Amy,” Austin says as he reaches out and takes my hand in his, smoothing his warm mouth against my skin with a light kiss. “I was hoping you'd show.” Austin smiles at me with his bright white teeth and hooks his elbow through mine. “Can I offer you a drink?”
    I pause as my mother lifts my hair up roughly and asks my aunt how she wants it done for the wedding. I adjust my vision a bit, trying to match the fire in Austin's eyes to my imaginary version of him. Actually, I think it might work a bit more like this.
    Austin sets his beer down on the rough wood of the counter and turns towards me.
    “Hot damn. If it isn't little Amy Cross.” He smirks and the edge of his lip where it's scarred, pulls at his face with the expression. “Your Mama let you out of your cage for the night?”
    I stare at Austin and suddenly feel stifled in my stupid cardigan, wishing he'd tear it from my shoulders and bruise my neck with rough kisses and grazing teeth. I clutch my purse tightly in my hands to control the flurry of emotions in my belly and glance away, not because I'm demure or embarrassed, but because I like the hard bulge that I can see in Austin's tight jeans and have to stop myself from staring at it.
    He moves across the room fast, too fast, so fast I don't see him until he's slamming me against the wall and putting his hand up my skirt.
    “Now, Miss Amy, let's see if you're as ready for me as I am for you.” I groan and –
    “Amy!” my mom snaps, like maybe this is the third or fourth time she's said my name. I blink several times and focus on her brown eyes, the ones that are so much darker and prettier than mine. Despite her German heritage, Mama looks exotic somehow, like maybe one of her ancestors wasn't being entirely honest about the parentage of her child. Unfortunately, I inherited none of that. My eyes are plain, a blue so dull they're nearly gray; the perfect match to my hair which complements the unstained wood trim that lines the walls of the shop. “Go change.”
    I don't question the order, don't tell her that I am twenty-one fucking years old and can make my own decisions about how and when and what I do.
    Jodie and Aunt Megan watch me with narrowed eyes as I retreat behind the curtains and slump to the bench, snatching my book up like it's a fine drink, something to soothe my nerves and make me forget my troubles.
    “ Adam?” I whisper, but he's nowhere to be found.
    He's left me.
    Adam has left me.
    My heart cries out while my body screams, certain that I'll die without his strong, hard arms wrapped around me. What will I do without those dark eyes and that sexy smile?
    I slam the covers closed and throw the book against the wall where it bounces back at me and hits me in the arm. My mother peeks her head in immediately to check on the commotion, and I can hardly stifle the urge to scream. Just a few hours ago, I was resigned to my fate. Now, all of a sudden, I can't wait to feel that sense of pain and anguish and longing that it's in my book. Maybe the energy of the motorcycle show is threading its way into my veins. After all these years living just a few blocks away, something was bound to rub off, wasn't it?
    “Stop fooling around, Amy. Get dressed.”
    “Yes, mother.” My words are hollow but my pulse continues to thrum like a live wire, making my neck feel vulnerable and exposed, almost desperate for the touch of another. I close my eyes and lean back against the wall, running my own fingers down the pale skin of my throat, sliding them under the fabric of the fuchsia nightmare, teasing the soft flesh of my breasts with my nails.
    I stop suddenly, tearing my hand away and panting like I've run a mile.
    Amy Cross, you need to get out more.
    I stand up and drop my dress to the floor, staring at myself in the mirror with wide eyes and flushed cheeks.
    Yes, out, out with Austin Sparks, I think as I send a silent apology to Adam, Daniel, and Micah.