Living Bipolar Read Online Free PDF

problems sleeping, problems concentrating, anxiety, or problems I'm having with relationships, whether personal or professional. When I get depressed and I hit a wall emotionally I try to figure out what life event triggered the depression. Additionally, I've learned that I must tell my psychiatrist any physical problems I've had, and I must get his permission before taking any type of vitamin, or over the counter medication, to make sure it doesn't interact with the medications I'm taking. For instance when I take Sudafed my body breaks out in a rash and my skin turns bright red and feels like I've been horribly burned by the sun.
    But one of the most important lessons I've learned is to do homework on the illness and research medications for myself. Most of this homework has come from talking to other Bipolar people and learning through their experience what has worked for them. I then take what they've done, research the medication myself (websites such as WebMD are great) and then I discuss this with my doctor to see what he thinks. When it comes to me taking medication I don’t have to settle for feeling bad or suffering in my life. I can work with my doctor to find the right combination of medication that will work to live a full, productive, and happy life.
    Relationships are hard. We wouldn’t be human if we didn’t have relationship problems. But when you are Bipolar relationships seem to be especially challenging. My mood state causes changes in the way other people treat me.
    When I am feeling good, that is, when I feel like myself, I am happy, friendly, outgoing and I have few problems in getting along with others. But when I am depressed I am distant, cold, withdrawn and very sensitive. In fact, I am sensitive to the point to where the slightest comment can hurt me. When I am depressed and “sensitive” and I get my feelings hurt, I get angry, frustrated and I experience such strong negative emotions that can result in me to creating a situation where I want nothing to do with the individual who hurt me and my feelings.
    Intimate relationships are an entirely different issue. When I feel good I am affectionate. But when I am depressed I don’t communicate well, I have trouble making decisions, and for the most part I don’t want to be alive.
    The characteristics I experience when I am depressed affect the woman I am intimate with. When I am depressed my mood and my way of being brings confusion, frustration, and resentment in the other person. Then, the other person I am in a relationship with takes my actions personally and they think they have done something wrong to have me act the way I am acting.
    I remember seeing a woman once who had no exposure with a Bipolar person, and therefore, she had no education about the illness. Although I would try my best to explain to her what happens with me when I go through my changes in mood, she was still unprepared for these mood changes. Even though I told her when I was feeling depressed and down -- and therefore gave her reasons for my change in behavior -- what I failed to prepare for is she still has feelings.
    Although I thought I had done my part by communicating with her my depression, I failed to realize that when I am in a relationship it’s not all about me, whether I’m depressed or not. When I am depressed I am still responsible for my actions, and I am still responsible for how I treat other people.
    Relationships take work and more work. In the past, I have ended relationships when I have gotten depressed. Instead of taking the time to work through difficulties and explain my situation, and learn solutions with my moods with the other person, I’ve taken the easy way out and I have just quit the relationship. But after so many failed relationships in my life I have come to a new awareness, where my old way of thinking and living no longer serves me.
    Today I take responsibility and action on changing how I treat other people whether I feel good or