entrepreneur to your average whoever. Unfortunately,
because of varying circumstances, one may not even get the chance
to establish a purpose. Sometimes a toddler playing outside has its
life cut short because a nearby coyote was hungry. Sometimes, a
person’s purpose to live is just to live, not just exist.
Everything has the ability to exist.
But Andrew truly believed he had a
purpose, a meaningful destiny. He was just going to let it come to
him rather than search for it himself. He would go with the flow
until the time was right. He also worried that he might screw up
his destiny by searching too early. But he always thought about
life and the wondrous experiences that came with it.
He has many memories
of metaphysical thoughts, questioning the world; some dated back to
when he was just a small child. One included an instance of him
staring at some drawer as his mother called to him,
thinking, My name’s Andrew. That’s funny.
Why is it Andrew? What if it was something else? He had never been worried about some specific
monster hiding in his bedroom during the dark, probably because his
parents taught him to be logical. That, or his parents never told
them about monsters being in the bedroom at night. However, as a
seven-year-old, after hearing about the possibility of aliens
existing in outer space, he thought, Do
aliens exist? I mean, it’s totally possible. Why would Earth be
alone? Then there was religion—he had
never gone to church, and he never really decided whether God
existed or not until he was a teenager. During that time, he
recognized that some Christian ideas just didn’t seem to add up,
whereas some of the Atheist ideas didn’t seem to explain enough, so
he decided to follow his own beliefs based on what he perceived and
concluded. He was free to be open-minded and think what he wanted;
he said at age thirteen that God existed, but was very doubtful
that Jesus Christ was the Son of God. Being as logical and
reasonable as he was, as he called it, he felt that some things
just didn’t compute for a mortal human to have magic powers such as
walking on water. Yet for some reason unknown to him until he was
an adult, he felt that souls could exist, that everyone had a
spirit that passed on into an afterlife when the physical body had
not.
As Andrew had found out, he became
very philosophical whenever he was depressed. If he came home
disappointed because some girl rejected him, or that he had been
bullied, or that he was just left out of something by his friends,
his mind would wander to the point that some completely irrelevant
ideas would pop up. Such ideas were rather strange and useless,
such as “How come we’re born as humans and not fish?” Answering
such questions would not help anyone much with the questions that
we search for the most, such as, “What is the meaning of the
universe? What is life?” The ironic thing is that we can’t seem to
answer these questions for ourselves until we die.
Andrew had lived a turbulent life just
like anybody else. He was diagnosed with autism as a kid, meaning
that he didn’t quite pick up on social cues like other children did
until he was older. He wasn’t very aware of his surroundings,
especially for news. On September 11, 2001, he had no idea at all
that something tragic was happening at New York on that day; he
didn’t even remember whether he saw anybody that looked devastated,
therefore he couldn’t tell if something was wrong. Often he would
sit at the table and hear his parents having a conversation when
suddenly one of them says, “Tell us what you think, Andrew,” and he
would reply, “What are we talking about?”
In first-grade, Andrew could remember
sitting in an isolated part of the playground eating a Pop-Tart,
satisfied, regardless of what the other kids were doing. On some
occasions he would ask to join a game of kickball or foursquare,
but ninety percent of his recesses were spent collecting acorns
under the nearby oak