Lakeland Lily Read Online Free PDF Page B

strength, lass. You’ve hardly eaten a thing since - well, since it happened. Everyone’s been hurt by this terrible accident. I do understand how you feel, love, but life goes on.’
    Lily could hear her mother’s words, the sort everyone uttered in such circumstances, and was grateful for her sympathy. But deep inside she knew that she did not understand at all. Nobody could. Hannah hadn’t lost the man she loved, the man she had meant to marry. And then her mother committed the ultimate sin.
    ‘I’m sure the Clermont-Reads, toffee-nosed though they may be, are every bit as upset as we are,’ she said, in her rough but kindly way. ‘And young Dick was always a bit of a gormless lad, bless him.’
    Lily was on her feet in a second. ‘How can you say that? You weren’t even there. You know nothing about it. The Clermont-Reads don’t give a toss about folk like us!’ Tears spurted, hot and fierce. ‘They’ve ruined my life. If Dick was a bit of a madcap, what of it? He was young and good and kind, with all his life before him. And I loved him. We were going to get married. ’
    At which point Arnie lifted his head long enough to take an interest in what was going on. ‘Married? Don’t talk daft, girl. Enough of this. You’re too young for such notions, our Lily. I’ll tell you when you can get wed.’
    ‘Oh, will you?’ she said, defying her father for the first time in her life and feeling a strange satisfaction at the startled expression that registered in his blue eyes. Then she was shocked to see them narrow and harden.
    ‘Aye, I will. And I’ll tell you who to, an’ all.’
    ‘Listen to your father, Lily,’ Hannah soothed. ‘I know you liked young Dick well enough. He were a grand lad. But you’ll find someone else. You’re young and will love again.’
    ‘Can’t you understand? I don’t want anyone else. I want Dick. And now he’s gone. ’
    Bursting into tears Lily fled noisily upstairs to the tiny room she shared with her younger sisters, the sound of her father’s voice echoing angrily after her. ‘Come back here this minute, girl. You’ll not speak to your mother in such a way.’
    But she did not go back. She paid him no heed at all. Nor did she speak to any of her sisters as later that evening they crept into the room and silently got ready for bed. So far as Lily was concerned, her life was empty, happiness vanquished, and she wished at this moment that she too were dead. What did she have to live for without Dick to love her? She’d never be a dressmaker now, never make her fortune and live in a fine house with a loving husband beside her. Probably never marry at all. Instead she must somehow find the strength to attend his funeral and watch them put his beautiful young body into the cold dark earth. She shuddered, and the pain in her chest expanded, filling her entire being with an anguish which robbed her of the very breath of life, her dreams turned to dust like that which filled the old ash pit.
    This thought reminded her of their last sweet love-making session on that very roof, of how he’d laid on top of her, pushing his tongue into her mouth, and a new fear started. What if the rumour were true and such kissing did get you a bairn? What would she do then? The tears spurted afresh, hot, unstoppable and horribly silent.
    Emma said, ‘I brought you a cheese and pickle sandwich, our Lily,’ thrusting a much squashed piece of bread in her hand. Two-year-old Kitty dabbed at the tears on her face with a damp flannel and Liza brought her a mug of hot tea from which Lily took two sips then left it to go cold. Only the warmth of her three sisters curled close about her like spoons in a drawer brought her the comfort she craved. And then at last, after two sleepless nights, Lily slept.
     
    The simple interment of young Dick Rawlins took place two days later. Lily stood in the stiff breeze of the churchyard, eyes red but squeezed dry of tears as she watched the bearers carry the