Killing Ruby Rose Read Online Free PDF

and the shoes and the general skills to win superficial popularity points. But most girls, like Taylor, didn’t go around knee-thrusting bullies in the crotch, even if they deserved it. And it probably didn’t help when Dad reprimanded me for said crotch-kicking with a poorly concealed smile on his face.
    In the last couple years, I’d managed to get involved in stuff like debate and student government, but I’d never managed to be, well, normal.
    “And yesterday,” I continued, “I saw this picture on the cover of a magazine—white rose petals dripping with blood, falling over an unidentified headstone—and above it in block letters: ‘Ruby Rose: Teen Hero Bleeding with Grief Over Her Fallen Father? Or Drenched with Guilt Over Her Dead Victim?’ ”
    Dr. Teresa must have sensed my latent insanity and put the pad and pen down to clear her throat and get my attention back.
    “Let’s not focus on that right now.”
    “But they’re right!” I shook my head in defiance. “What the hell was I doing there? How did this happen to me?”
    I knew exactly how this had happened, though . I’d brought it all on myself . I’d been tracking LeMarq (and a few others like him) for weeks , and voila —the consequences had arrived . I knew that what I was doing was dangerous. I just hadn’t quite realized how killing a monster like him would make me feel .
    “We don’t know why this happened…” She trailed off, seemingly looking for the right words. She was always exact in her language, which made for long pauses. “But I’m sure your mother and the police will figure it out.”
    I felt the bubbling need to purge myself of my sin. I had to tell someone what I’d done. Someone safe.
    “I want to tell you something.” I made eye contact for the first time today. A risky move, and one I didn’t take lightly. “Doctor-patient confidentiality, OK?” I knew the law.
    “Of course.” She uncrossed her flared-leg yoga pants and sat forward with anticipation.
    “I was sort of stalking Charlie LeMarq,” I semiwhispered, just in case there was a bug in the room.
    There it was, the truth I’d been holding on to. The key bit of information I refused to give Detective Martinez so he could crucify me. The secret I’d never even told Mom or Alana.
    Except Dr. T’s eyes weren’t lit up anymore. Shouldn’t she be relieved at the breakthrough? I’d finally opened up. Granted, I’d done so with a real doozy, but she had to be used to my personality by now.
    “Excuse me? Stalking ? ” She tried to sound calm, but her shock reverberated between us.
    “I was tailing him. Doing surveillance,” I said like it was a reasonable thing to do. “The guy was literally getting away with murder over and over again, and I wanted to catch him doing something so he would finally be put away. I had no intention of killing him. I swear.” I held up my hands like that would convince her.
    “So the night you confronted him, you were not following him?” she asked, suspicion snaking up between us.
    “I was going to, but then I got the text that I thought was from Liam.” I reached for my phone to prove it to her. Thank heavens the forensic team had let me have my phone back; otherwise, even I could have doubted this all really happened. “See, here’s the text—”
    “I believe you.” She waved away the phone. “I just have to think about this. It should have been shared with me a long time ago.”
    “I couldn’t,” I argued. “You would’ve convinced me to stop following them.”
    “Excuse me? Them ? ” She angled her head at me as if she hadn’t heard right.
    “Yeah, I was sort of … following five different guys.” I braced myself as she took her time absorbing my words. “You told me to find an outlet.”
    “Ruby,” she said with a shake of her head, clearly indicating to me that my argument wouldn’t work. “And you promise you’re not doing this anymore?”
    “Of course not. Please, Dr. T, you