Killer Riff Read Online Free PDF

flustered and hoped he couldn’t feel it through my hand. It’s times like these that I want so desperately to be Lana Turner, all cool composure and well-timed gesture. But I’m always June Allyson, all stammers and earnest smiles. I try to comfort myself with the fact that June Allyson usually winds up with the guy at the end. Even if he never gets Lana Turner completely out of his system.
    What on earth were we thinking? We, not just I, because he’d agreed to it. Given that we hadn’t seen each other for almost two months, how did we think we could meet in a club for a drink and carry it off as if it were a normal after-work rendezvous and not a reunion carrying the weight of everything hat had gone unsaid and unresolved in the meantime? Drinks with friends and then what? Dinner? Dessert? Depositions?
    Then again, there was a lot to be said for taking this step in the presence of other people, said presence making it all the more important to be polite and restrained and not get all weepy and hyperventilate. Not that I thought Kyle was considering that, but I certainly was.
    He, damn him, had the presence of mind to look me in the eye, squeeze my hand gently, and say, “Good to see you.”
    I smiled. “You too.” I kissed him on the cheek, and he pressed his cheek against mine. I thought of Lana Turner and John Garfield in The Postman Always Rings Twice and considered throwing him down on the coffee table before God, my friends, and all the patrons of the Bubble Lounge. Instead, I remembered my manners, took a deep breath, and gently guided him to sit next to me on the couch.
    “Are you on duty, Kyle, or can we buy you a drink?” Cassady asked, already signaling for the waitress.
    “I’m here to celebrate,” he said, casting a dubious eye on my kir royale. “But nothing fancy.”
    Cassady ordered him a glass of Taittinger while Tricia leaned out of her chair to put her hand on his shoulder. “It’s so nice to see you, Kyle.”
    “Good to see all of you, too.”
    “Isn’t it great news?” she said with a nod in my direction.
    “Yes, it is. Amazing how people can be slow to recognize how lucky they are to have her in their lives.” He looked down to take my hand and squeeze it gently, so he missed the huge eyes both Cassady and Tricia gave that pronouncement. Having an audience for this definitely wasn’t such a good idea, because it made me want to jump up and proclaim, “Did you both hear that?”
    Again, Cassady got to her feet first. “Excuse me. I can never remember where the restroom is here.” Tricia started to point helpfully, but Cassady arched an eyebrow at her. “Come help me find it, Tricia.”
    Tricia smiled guiltily, and they swept off, arm in arm. I watched them go because I didn’t quite trust myself to look right at him. Especially when he said, “You look great.”
    I tried to clear the flutter out of my throat before I turned. It wasn’t my imagination; his eyes had gotten bluer since the last time I’d seen him. Licking my lips delicately to make sure I wasn’t drooling, I said, “You too.”
    He studied my face for a long moment before saying, “Thanks for calling.”
    “Thanks for coming.”
    “Seriously, you been okay?”
    I started to shrug and say something noncommittal, then remembered what Cassady had said about vulnerability. And what Jesus had said about the truth. “No. Have you?”
    He was the one who shrugged. “No. Serves me right. I wanted time to think. And all I’ve done is think about you.”
    I touched my fingertips to his lips, almost expecting him to pixilate away like some hologram I’d created out of desire and frustration. But other than kissing my fingertips, he didn’t move, he didn’t go away, he was really there, really back.
    “I missed you,” I said quietly.
    He nodded, taking my hand and pressing his lips to the palm. I could have sat there for a century, easily, but then what came next was even more amazing. “I’m sorry,” he