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smell comes along. Everyone groans again as I put him in the backseat. I ignore them and punch in Jer’s number. It’s time to get out of this zoo.
    â€œYo.” Jer sounds as if I woke him. “Spence. What’s happening?”
    â€œWell,” I say, “I’m with Gl—Miss Lorraine.”
    â€œCool. So, mission accomplished? You’ve been a while. I must have snoozed. You done soon?”
    â€œWell, that’s the thing.” I know I have to be careful here. Gloria Lorraine still has the gun in her lap. “We’re not exactly at the Lodge right now. We’re, um, running some errands. Kind of. And it’s going to take us a couple more hours—”
    â€œDays,” says Gloria Lorraine
    â€œDays,” I say.
    â€œDAYS?” That’s me, Jer, Al and AmberLea all at once. Our voices go up like roller coasters.
    Gloria Lorraine nods.
    â€œUh, yeah, days,” I say to Jer.
    â€œOr no kiss,” says Gloria Lorraine.
    â€œOr no kiss,” I repeat. Oh yeah; for a moment I’d forgotten that. “I guess I have to.”
    â€œListen, Spence.” Jer’s voice gets firmer. “No, you don’t. This is screwy enough already. Tell me where you are and I’ll come get you.”
    It sounds good to me. I look around. But what do I tell him? That I’m sitting near a supermarket, behind a Dumpster, in a white Caddy with a trunk full of something that probably isn’t icing sugar. I’m with a grumpy girl, a sketchy baker, a stinky Chihuahua and a ninety-year-old with a loaded gun? Do I just say, You’ll know us when you see us ? For a second I wonder what Bunny would think of this. What will I tell him? I think of my cousins in France or Spain or Africa. What will I tell them? And AmberLea, who, while not superhot, is still pretty nice in skinny jeans: am I going to wimp out in front of her, just because her grandma waves a pistol with the safety off? What would I tell Grandpa? I think of how I dreamed of making my own movie. I take a deep breath. “No,” I say, “it’s okay. I’m cool with it. I have to make the movie.”
    Behind me, Al says, “Movie? Over my dead body.”
    â€œObviously that can be arranged,” says Gloria Lorraine. Mister Bones yelps.
    â€œWas that a dog?” Jer asks.
    â€œYeah, we’re at one of those dog-grooming places.” Where did that come from? I don’t know. All I know is that I’ve got to finish this. “Why don’t you go back to Aunt Vicky’s?”
    â€œTell him to go home,” says Gloria Lorraine. “I’ll get you back there.”
    â€œOr go home,” I say to Jer. “Miss Lorraine promises to get me back.”
    â€œBut—” Jer says.
    â€œI’ve got to go.”
    â€œDamn right,” Al says.
    I ignore him. “A couple of days. I’ll call. I promise. Nothing to worry about.”
    â€œBut, Spence—”
    â€œTrust me,” I say. I switch off the phone. My heart is pounding, but it’s a good pounding. I think.
    â€œThat’s more like it,” says Gloria Lorraine. “I bet that’s what your grandpa would have done.” She points to the GPS . “Now, aim that thing north and get us to Canada.”

REEL TWO
    EXT.—LONG SHOT—DAY
    A white Cadillac convertible, top down, rolls slowly to a fortified border crossing on a country road: guard tower, machine guns, tank traps, sandbags topped with concertina wire. Armed sentries man the gate. As the Cadillac stops, a SOLDIER steps to driver’s side. SPENCER is driving, AMBERLEA (Amy Faris?) in front passenger seat, GLORIA LORRAINE (Betty White) in backseat with MISTER BONES on lap.
    EXT.—WIDE SHOT LOOKING UP TO SOLDIER FROM SPENCER’S P.O.V.—DAY
    SOLDIER
    snapping fingers twice)
    Papers. Passports.
    EXT.—WIDE SHOT INTO CAR FROM OVER SOLDIER’S SHOULDER—DAY
    SPENCER
    (handing