Jase & the Deadliest Hunt Read Online Free PDF Page B

what makes a rope bridge cool?” Willie asks.
    “Oh no. Here we go.”
    “That it’s rope. And you know what’s cool about rope? You can cut into it. So you know   —on a rope bridge , why in the world would you attack ducks with the sharpest sword in the known universe? Wouldn’t you think   —?”
    “Yeah.”
    Willie laughs. “I mean, I would think that   —”
    “Uh-huh.”
    “Any logical man would know   —”
    “Absolutely,” you say. “So are we done?”
    “Oh yeah, we’re done,” Willie says. “‘Hi, Korie. This is Willie. Yeah, we got ourselves a big, fat boar that we’re bringing home. But no. We couldn’t find anything else. Jase almost killed himself cutting down a rope bridge.’”
    “Tell her I said hello.”
    “Oh, I will,” Willie says as he leaves the room. “I will.”
    You lie still for a minute before you smell something familiar.
    Peanut butter.
    You realize you’ll probably never eat peanut butter again for the rest of your life.
    THE END
    Start over.
    Read “Let the Good Times Roll: A Note from John Luke Robertson.”

ROOMMATES

    THERE’S NOTHING LIKE WILD ANIMALS ATTACKING to make you a little homesick. You have no idea what time it is back home, but if it’s night there too, the kids are asleep. Missy is dreaming about finding the perfect outfit on sale. It’s quiet.
    And there are definitely no signs of spider monkeys bouncing and attacking in anyone’s bedroom.
    But this is what you encounter in Cole’s room. The monkeys are black and white and red, and they’re freaking out. Cole’s trying to fend them off, but there are too many. They’re on his shoulders and his head and his legs and his arms.
    “Don’t you wish you had a video recorder?” you whisper to John Luke.
    “A little help here!” Cole shouts before a spider monkey punches him in the mouth.
    You hold up your sword. A blast of thunder cracks outside. “Has everybody gone crazy tonight?”
    “Yeah, I think so,” John Luke says. “But at least Uncle Si isn’t here to say something crazy.”
    “True.”
    Then you attack.
    Spider monkeys are pretty active. And they’re difficult to pin down.
    So it takes the three of you a long time to get rid of the twenty or so monkeys in the room.
    When you think you’re done, you hear a sound from another room down the hall.
    “That’s gotta be Willie.”
    “I bet it’s snakes,” John Luke says.
    “No, I bet it’s some kind of bird,” Cole says. “Like a bunch of owls.”
    The image of a roomful of owls attacking Willie is kinda funny.
    You hear his howl and you laugh. It’s not funny   —but it’s kinda funny.
    John Luke and Cole are ready with their samurai swords.
    “We look pretty tough,” you say. “Like we’re starring in an end-of-the-world movie.”
    Willie screams again.
    “Should we help him?” John Luke asks.
    You think about it for a minute. A long minute.
    “Yeah. I guess.”
    You get there and find Willie crouched in the corner.
    There’s only one animal in his room. How it got there is a good question. Why he’s screaming is another good question.
    “Willie,” you say.
    He screams again until he realizes you guys are there.
    The moose in the middle of the room is just standing still. It’s not attacking him. It actually looks sorta bored.
    “Willie, what are you doing?”
    “That monster moose was attacking and gonna kill me, and I wasn’t going to   —”
    “The thing looks half-asleep.”
    You extend a hand to Willie. Then you lift him up and lead him past the big ole moose.
    “See?”
    “That thing was going to kill me.” Willie picks up his sword from the floor, his eyes wide.
    “Uh-uh.” You shake your head. “Just   —just leave him in the room.”
    “This is madness.”
    “No. You should’ve seen the spider monkeys. This is   —this is actually kinda funny.”
    You all head out of Willie’s room and make sure to close the door.
    Once you’re back in the living room, you light a