Jane Carver of Waar Read Online Free PDF

eating pumpkins. Ah hell, forget it. You try and describe a taste. I dare you. Whatever it was, it was food. I wolfed down four little pies as Sai continued his story.
    “Usually the ordeal is purely ceremonial. The groom and the father touch swords, the father falls back, the groom departs with his bride as the women wail the traditional laments, and all that went as arranged. But this Kedac-Zir, the animal, decided to exercise the other part of the ritual and take Wen-Jhai from me before I brought her safely to my home.”
    I stopped chewing. “This was all part of some ritual? Killing all these guys? Can’t you sic the law on him?”
    Sai made a face. “No no. Kedac-Zir is perfectly within his rights. Here in benighted Ora we believe that a man who can’t hold onto his bride doesn’t deserve to keep her. Wen-Jhai is Kedac-Zir’s betrothed now, unless I can reach him before the wedding and defeat him in single combat. Then she would be mine again. But as you can see, I unfortunately am a man of words, not actions. And a wounded man of words at that. She is lost to me, forever.”
    “Man, that blows chunks.” Poor kid. I guess it doesn’t matter where you go in the universe, the jocks still pick on the brains.
    He nodded. “I know not this phrase, but your meaning is clear, and true. When news of this defeat reaches home I will not be welcome in my father’s house. To have lost my bride is one thing. Not to have died defending her is unforgivable. I will be scorned by society. Perhaps I will enter the priesthood.”
    He closed his eyes. I worried for a second, but he was still breathing, so I let him be. I guess talking so much had worn him out.
    It was at that moment, sitting in the middle of a bunch of dead purple guys and their luggage, eating strange food and talking to an honest-to-god alien that it all caught up to me. I thought, “Well I guess I ain’t goin’ to jail any time soon,” and that was it. I started laughing so hard I couldn’t breathe, that laughter where your chest hurts and no sound comes out.
    I guess you had to be there. Okay, maybe it wasn’t funny, not even then. Maybe I was just hysterical. Sai sure didn’t appreciate it. He opened his eyes and raised an eyebrow. “Does my plight amuse you?”
    I shook my head and tried to talk through the spasms. “My plight... Not yours... My plight’s amusing the hell out of me.”
    It took me a second to stop chuckling. I could see Sai steal a look at all my jiggling flesh. He looked away, as embarrassed, and waved toward the trunks. “Mistress, it pains me to see you... distressed in this way. Please. My lady’s garments will only go to waste in this desert. Take whatever you like.”
    He was right. I needed some duds. If we were heading for polite society I couldn’t be walking around with my skin hanging out—not all of it anyway. “Good plan, bro. You just rest up a bit and I’ll make myself decent.”
    He nodded wearily and closed his eyes.
    I glanced through Sai’s fiancée’s stuff. Not a chance. The waist of one of her fancy loincloths wouldn’t have fit around one of my thighs, let alone my hips. And the tops? Forget it. It would have been like trying to fit footballs into egg cups. Time to get practical. This planet seemed to be a place where fights happened at the drop of a hat. I gave up on the frilly stuff and turned to the dead guys.
    First I tried out some of the swords. I didn’t know bad from good. I just picked the one that felt best in my hand. They were all as light as toys. More gravity problems. I’d just have to get used to it. Next I found a dead guy close to my build and stripped off his harness, armor and loincloth. It was all a little sticky and stinky. There wasn’t much to do about the armor or the harness, but I rinsed the loincloth in water from a little wooden keg. I have some standards.
    The harness went on no problem. It was adjustable, with buckles and cinches and rawhide ties. The armored