Jamison (Beautiful Mine #3) Read Online Free PDF

It all came to a head that night I swallowed those pills.
    “They’re not ready,” I said, snapping back into the present.
    “Is that for you to decide, though?” She treaded carefully with her words. “Can we talk about why you feel they’re not ready? I’m sensing there’s something more we need to dig into.”
    My fingers drummed against my knee as I stared at the off-white wall behind Dr. Strong’s perfect head of ash-blonde hair. If I told my parents I might die, it could really hurt them. Set them back. But if I told them I might die and they didn’t care, that would hurt me even more. Either way, things were easier for all of us if they didn’t know.
    “I need to go.” I stood up, slipping my purse over my shoulder.
    “Sophie, you okay?” she asked, confusion washing over her expression. “What’s going on?”
    “I shouldn’t have come today.” I pulled her door open and raced down the hall, praying she wouldn’t chase after me and make a scene.
    She didn’t.

 

 
    JAMISON
     
    I climbed the stairs from the subway station at Franklin and headed toward Hudson Street. I stopped into Great China and picked up my usual Friday night order and a bottle of red and rounded the corner to my apartment.
    “What are you doing tonight?” Daphne had asked me at work earlier that afternoon. We’d ended things months ago, but she refused to let me go. An unwavering hope wouldn’t allow it.
    “The usual,” I told her.
    “Want company?” she’d asked.
    “No.”
    She’d lingered in the doorway of my office, studying my face with her arms crossed. I’d known Daphne since we were kids. Our mothers were sorotity sisters at Dartmouth. Imagine my surprise when I realized Daphne followed me to Johns Hopkins to pursue her psychology degrees. We dated and she eventually followed me to the city, blaming it on a job offer she couldn’t refuse, as if I wouldn’t see through her. She was clear as cellophane. She wanted me and she was doing everything in her power to make me hers. Only she failed miserably. I wasn’t interested in shallow companionship. We only ever looked good on paper and in pictures. That was it.
    “You’re just going to spend Friday night all by yourself?” She pouted her red lips, the very same ones I used to kiss back when I thought I loved her—before I knew what love was.
    I’d spent my entire twenties going to school and working, and when I had a free night in my schedule Daphne would expect to be wined and dined, or she’d plan weekend getaways or beg me to escort her to every little party she could find. A decade of dating Daphne had been exhausting.
    “I enjoy the peace and quiet.” I’d glanced up at the clock. It was time to get back to work. “If you’ll excuse me.” I brushed past her, shutting my office door and locking it. “Don’t you have an appointment, or something?”
    “Yeah.” She had rolled her eyes. “This girl Bledsoe referred. I don’t know why she wants to talk to me. She argues with everything I say. If you ask me, she’s suicidal, but she won’t admit it.”
    “You think everyone’s suicidal,” I’d said as I slipped my hands in my pockets. Daphne was paid to listen for a living, but when it came to us, her self-serving nature only ever allowed her to hear what she wanted to hear, especially when I’d told her for years how unhappy I was with our relationship. In the end, I had realized we were both fooling ourselves. I’d never experienced true, unconditional love in all of my life, and she was more than happy to settle for something that only looked good on the outside.
    I had raised my hand in the air, giving her a quick wave as I walked down the corridor.
    By six-thirty that night, I’d rounded the corner to my apartment, only to be met with the saddest brown eyes I’d ever seen.
    “Sophie?” I called out as she walked toward me, her eyes darting toward the street as she attempted to cross. She turned toward my voice, searching