Jackson's Dilemma Read Online Free PDF

only two world religions, your oriental Christianity, and Islam. Don’t you agree, Tuan?’
    ‘And Judaism,’ said Tuan. I believe—’
    ‘Judaism of course,’ said Owen. ‘Our future will be total destruction, Heraclitus was right, war is the king of all things, war is necessity, it brings everything about. Kafka was right too, we are in the Penal Colony, behind our rotten bourgeois civilisation is a world of indescribable pain and horror and sin which alone is real.’
    ‘I’m glad you mention sin,’ murmured Mildred.
    ‘Is that what you really believe?’ said Edward to Owen.
    ‘He believes in romantic heroism and discuter les idées générales avec les femmes supérieures,’ said Benet.
    ‘It isn’t all play!’ said Mildred, defending Owen.
    ‘Well, I think we are now drunk enough,’ said Benet, ‘we must not go on to get cross! Let us now go out into the garden and breathe deeply and admire the marvels of nature. I suggest we rise and give our usual toast, and another very special toast as well.’
    The diners were now rising and moving their chairs.
    ‘First to dear Uncle Tim, whom we love and whose spirit is still with us.’
    ‘Uncle Tim!’ Glasses were raised and everyone was solemn. After which all remained standing, expectant, during a brief silence. ‘And now let us all drink the health of our dear friend and neighbour, Edward Lannion, and his absent bride, Marian Berran, who this time tomorrow will be Mrs Lannion! May these two lovely young people have long and happy lives, may they have happy children and may all of us here be privileged to share in their joy and goodness. Marian and Edward!’
    ‘Marian and Edward!’ During the toast, Edward, pale, almost alarmed, looking suddenly very young, having hesitated about sitting down, stood, first lowering his head, then lifting it, and looked about upon the company with an air of frightened gratitude. Benet now moved quickly in case Edward should feel that he must now make a speech.
    ‘Come on now, all of you, out into the garden!’
     
    They all crowded out into the garden, passing back from the dining room into the drawing room whose glass doors opened onto the paved terrace and the grass. There was a light on the terrace, revealing the brilliant colours of flowers in big mossy stone urns. Beyond was what at first seemed like darkness, but was in a few moments seen to be starlight. The moon was not present, being elsewhere. But a dense light came to them from the innumerable crowding stars of the Milky Way. Upon the grass, already damp with dew, they stopped at first, looking up with silent awe, then talking to each other in soft voices, gradually separating, never going too far away as if, though exalted, they were also afraid.
    Owen, taking Tuan’s arm, led the youth away from the house, past the scattering of bushy shrubs and past the dainty birch copse, towards the Wellingtonias. The great silent trees, faintly visible, were outlined against the starry sky whose crowded curtain reached down to the darkened horizon of the garden. The air was thick with moisture and the smell of dewy earth and the faint perfumes of leaves and flowers and the fresh breathing of the huge tall trees.
    Owen led Tuan into a sudden darkness, a great soundless presence. The starry dome was taken from them and they moved upon a different carpet. Owen stopped, releasing Tuan’s arm and taking hold of his hand. He turned the boy gently to face him and sighed, now touching his head, his hair, drawing his fingers gently down over Tuan’s brow, his nose and mouth. Things like this had happened before. Tuan, who did not share Owen’s inclinations, but loved him, stood quietly dreamily smiling, now leaning back against one of the trees. Owen kissed him.
    Mildred and Rosalind had crossed the lawn in another direction towards the stone steps, now faintly visible, which led down to the rose garden. There was, now just visible, the lucid wet sound of a fountain,