Indulge Read Online Free PDF Page B

and looked at me sternly, shaking his head. He looked back at the girl and pulled her hood from her head. My mouth fell open in shock and guilt swiftly cut into my gut. She was just a young, human girl. Allowing myself to focus and clear my jumbled thoughts, I could hear her heart beating rapidly. She was afraid. Of me.
    “I’m sorry.” I took another step toward her, but Arrick’s hand flew up again to stop me and I obeyed. I had never felt so ashamed in all my life. How did I let myself get so out of control?
    I watched Arrick whisper to the girl and she quickly skittered out of the room, sure to give me a wide berth. Then he gave me a heavy, disappointed look. I couldn’t blame him; I felt like a monster.
    “You need to be more careful, Claire. There is a lot of anger in you, and you need to learn to control it.” His tone was filled with concern, but my body still tensed as he approached me.
    “I don’t know what happened. I felt your shock and then something just snapped.” I threw my hands up in the air and stared at him. I searched his eyes, hoping he believed me. Knowing that I let him down made me realize how much I needed him.
    He nodded. “You are still angry about what happened with Ana. Sometimes it can take weeks before the rage will completely die down.” He put his arm around me, causing me to instinctively bring my hands back to my throat. “I didn’t mean to hurt you, but I couldn’t let you harm that girl. You could have easily killed her.”
    “I know.” I took in a deep breath, praying for my nerves to settle.
    I let Arrick guide me through the Château, not paying attention to anything around us. My eyes were fixated on the floor as we walked.
    “I’m not angry with you, okay?” He tried to reassure me. “You are still a young vampire, and it will take time to learn to control your instincts. Besides, I should have warned you.”
    “Warned me about what? That I’m a monster?” I grumbled. He might not be mad at me for what I did, but I wasn’t going to let myself off that easy.
    “No. And don’t ever call yourself that, you understand me?” I nodded glumly. “That was Lya,” he went on. “She is a servant here. Many of the humans who work here have taken on the nocturnal schedule of vampires. She just startled me as I walked into the room. I should have been paying closer attention. So, technically, it’s my fault.” Arrick smiled at me and I couldn’t stop myself from grabbing him, pulling his firm body into a solid hug.
    He stood still, surprised for only a moment before returning the hug. His large hands held my head to his chest and caressed my hair. As much as I was savoring the moment, I couldn’t help but think I was standing in a strange hallway of a Château that I never knew as my home with parents somewhere nearby I had never met. The only thing in my life at this moment that I felt I could count on was Arrick. I tightened my grip, trying to convey how much I needed him. Right now, he was all I had. I couldn’t even trust myself anymore.
    “You’ve been through a lot. What happened with Luka and Ana…”
    “Yes I have,” I said, my voice more confident than I felt.
    Arrick let me hug him as long as I needed. When I finally released him, Arrick continued to guide us, me perched beneath his arm, until we came to an ivory doorway. It was covered in a design of golden swirls, like vines had taken over and claimed it.
    The room we entered was a bedroom, large and expansive. One entire side of the room was lined with a large balcony, open to the cool night. I was grateful for the air. Until that moment I didn’t much feel like being confined by four walls. I felt suffocated by my own body. My very thoughts weighed me down.
    I didn’t know what to say to him. We hadn’t spoken about what happened. I didn’t know if I could. But did I even have a choice? I wanted this all to end, and there was only one to do it. Ana had to die.
    Arrick eyed my wearily,