In Persuasion Nation Read Online Free PDF Page B

frank,
though quite advanced, having been here three years, there are, if
you will, places where things used to be when I went looking for
them, brainwise, but now, when I go there, nothing is there, it is
like I have the shelving but not the cans of corn, if you get my
drift. For example, looking at you, young lady, I know enough to say
you are pretty, but when I direct my brain to a certain place, to
find there a more vivid way of saying you are pretty, watch this,
some words will come out, which I, please excuse me, oh dammit—
    Then
his voice changed to this announcer voice and he was like, These
women know that for many generations entrenched deep in this ancient
forest is a secret known by coffeegrowers since the dawn of time man
has wanted one thing which is to watch golf in peace will surely
follow once knowledge is dispersed and the World Book is a super
bridge across the many miles the phone card can close the gap!
    And
his eyes were crossing and he was sputtering, which would have been
funny if we did not know that soon our eyes would be the crossing
eyes and out of our mouths would the sputter be flying.
    Then
he got up and fled from the room, hitting himself hard in the face.
    And I
said to Carolyn, Well, that about does it for me.
    And I
waited for her to say that about did it for her, but she only sat
there looking conflicted with her hand on her belly.
    Out in
the Common Room, I took her in my arms and said, Honey, I do not
really think we have it all that bad, why not just go home and love
each other and our baby when he or she comes, and make the best of
all the blessings what we have been given?
    And
her head was tilted down in this way that seemed to be saying, Yes,
sweetie, my God, you were right all along.
    But
then a bad decisive thing happened, which was this old lady came
hobbling over and said, Dear, you must wait until Year Two to truly
know, some do not thrive but others do, I am Year Two, and do you
know what? When I see a bug now, I truly see a bug, when I see a
paint chip I am truly seeing that paint chip, there is no distraction
and it is so sweet, nothing in one's field of vision but what one
opts to put there via moving one's eyes, and also do you hear how
well I am speaking?
    Out in
the minivan I said, Well I am decided, and Carolyn said, Well I am
too. And then there was this long dead silence, because I knew and
she knew that what we had both decided was not the same decision, not
at all, that old crony had somehow rung her bell!
    And I
said, How do you know what she said is even true?
    And
she said, I just know.

    That
night in our double Privacy Tarp, Carolyn nudged me awake and said,
Jon, doesn't it make sense to make our mistakes in the
    direction
of giving our kid the best possible chance at a beautiful life?
    And I
was like, Chick, please take a look in the Fridge, where there is
every type of food that must be kept cold, take a look on top of the
Fridge, where there is every type of snack, take a look in our Group
Closet, which is packed with gratis designerwear such as Baby Gap and
even Baby Ann Taylor, whereas what kind of beautiful life are you
proposing with a Fridge that is empty both inside and on top, and the
three of us going around all sloppenly, because I don't know about
you but my skill set is pretty limited in terms of what do I know how
to do, and if you go into the Fashion Module for Baby Ann Taylor and
click with your blinking eyes on Pricing Info you will find that they
are not just giving that shit away.
    And
she said, Oh, Jon, you break my heart, that night when you came to my
Tarp you were like a lion taking what he wanted but now you are like
some bunny wiffling his nose in fright.
    Well,
that wasn't nice, and I told her that wasn't nice, and she said,
Jesus, don't whine, you are whining like a bunny, and I said I would
rather be a bunny than a rag, and she said maybe I better go sleep
somewhere else.
    So I
went out to Boys and slept on the floor, it being too