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place, but I was disappointed inthe Herb. I thought she knew better. She is becoming very frivolous just lately.
    And I have just worked out that one about the girl with slates on her head. Roof . I still don’t think it’s funny.
Friday
    I have been ambushed! I was talking to Aaron, on our way out of school—actually I was telling him about the Argentinosaurus, which is the largest dinosaur known to man—when we heard this strange, high-pitched squeaking like a colony of bats. Aaron immediately stopped and said, “Wossatt?” I told him not worry about it. I already had bad feelings.
    â€œWot is it?”
    It was coming from behind some big shrubby things which cluster by the gate.
    â€œThere’s a load of girls,” said Aaron.
    I said yeah, it was where they hung out, and gave him a shove. I was about to explain to him how the Argentinosaurus was the height of a four-storey building and the length of two school buses, which are the sort of facts I should think anyone would be glad to know, when suddenly, from out of nowhere, jet-propelled, a body came hurtling towards us andthrew itself on the ground in front of me.
    I am glad to report that I didn’t hesitate: I simply stepped right over it.
    â€œTwelve metres,” I said. “ Twelve metres . You’ve got to admit, that’s pretty damn tall! And twenty-threemetres long. That’d stretch from here to about…I dunno! As far as the traffic lights, maybe?”
    Aaron said, “Yeah…maybe.”
    â€œMaybe even further. Maybe right down’s far as the High Street.” I jerked at his arm. “What d’you reckon?”
    He said, “Yeah. I dunno. Maybe. What d’you think she did that for?”
    I said, “Who knows? Just felt like it, I s’ppose.”
    I managed to drag him away, but it was a nasty moment.
    What cheek! What utter nerve! The Microdot has just had a go at me. She says I’m heartless and unfeeling.
    â€œPoor Linzi faints at your feet and you just leave her lying there!”
    I said, “She didn’t faint, she chucked herself down on purpose.”
    â€œShe fainted! She has a crush on you. This is the sort of thing that happens when people have crushes on people. You’d think you’d be grateful. I’ve never heard of anything so cruel…just walking on and leaving her! She could have had a heart attack. She could have died .”
    I said, “Yeah, and so could I. I could have tripped over and broken my neck. And don’t tell me you didn’tput her up to it cos I know perfectly well that you did!”
    The Microdot tossed her head. “So what?”
    â€œSo it was totally irresponsible. Stupid thing to do!”
    She flushed, angrily. “As a matter of fact it was a test , if you want to know. And you failed it! There’s obviously something wrong with you. You obviously have a hate thing for girls.”
    I don’t have a hate thing for girls. I know that they are necessary, and if they were all like the Herb we would get on fine. The Herb doesn’t beam and gush and make a nuisance of herself. She doesn’t persecute me!
    I am feeling quite bothered. I think I shall have to make a list.
    List of all my Dinosaur Books :
    On the Trail of the Dinosaur
    The Age of the Dinosaur
    Talking about Dinosaurs
    Back to the Dinosaurs
    Facts about Dinosaurs
    The Big Book of Dinosaurs
    The Encyclopaedia of Dinosaurs.
    I also have six books on fossils, four on prehistoric mammals and two on being a CSI.
    I did all this from memory! I am feeling a bit calmer, now.
Saturday
    Wonders will never cease! This morning, while we were cleaning out the cats’ litter trays, which is our special Saturday task, the Microdot said she wanted to talk to me. I almost told her not to bother, as I thought she was going to start shrieking again, but for once she was quite restrained.
    She said, “I want to ask you something…You don’t