Humpty's Bones Read Online Free PDF

about so big.’ She held out her hands to indicate a yard across. ‘It did look peculiar, though. It was quite deep. At the time I thought that it might be where a tree had been taken out and the root had pulled out a big chunk of soil. At the bottom of the crater was a hole. I assumed a rabbit had dug it.’
    ‘That’s where people had been dropping in coins through the centuries.’
    Heather pursed her lips as she thought about it. ‘I guess you’re right. Perhaps it was the equivalent of a wishing well. You know, toss in a penny and make a wish. So, Humpty.’ She addressed the skeleton. ‘You’ve been lying there while folk chucked money at you. Hardly resting in peace, is it?’
    ‘Or they were paying him?’
    ‘Come again?’
    Eden nodded at the bones that so much resembled dirty twigs. ‘Paying him. Making offerings of coins.’
    ‘Paying him to do what?’
    ‘Stay where he is. Not to harm them.’
    Heather stared for a moment, then gave sharp-sounding laugh. ‘That’s beautifully imagined, Eden.’
    ‘Don’t laugh. It’s possible.’
    ‘You mean for the last eighteen hundred years men, women and children have been creeping furtively up to the hole and dropping their hard cash into it before scurrying away again before a bony hand darts out to grab them by the ankle?’
    ‘I’m serious, it adds up.’
    ‘Now you’re pulling my leg, Eden. Here let me top you up. Is that the time? I must switch the oven on.’
    ‘I’ve beaten you to it.’ Curtis stooped to enter through the low door. ‘The pizzas are already in.’
    ‘Is Wayne coping at the studio?’
    ‘The bloody fool. He didn’t realise that all he needed to do was to turn down the thermostat to lower the heating. He’s had the Dutch band cooking in the control room as they’ve worked on a sound mix. If Wayne screws up one more time... ’ He helped himself to wine. ‘Stick with your work, Eden. It’s got to be less stressful than running a recording studio. Ah, your bony wee chap has got a neck now.’
    Eden said, ‘He’s also got a name - Humpty.’
    ‘Yes. Humpty Dumpty. What happened to his head?’
    ‘Ah, that’s the mystery,’ Heather sighed. ‘I’ve nearly a complete skeleton, as far as I can judge.’
    ‘Only no noodle bone?’
    Eden made a point of joining in (to ensure talk didn’t drift back to the arson), ‘No human skull, although Heather’s found a dog’s jawbone.’
    ‘And parts of the cranium along with an eye ridge.’
    ‘It doesn’t surprise me. They’re crazy about dogs round here. They even called the village Dog Lands. We’re in Dog Star House, and there’s all kinds of Dog Lanes, Hounds Heaths. Plus there’s a weird carving of a dog in the lintel above the church door. The whole place must be barking mad.’
    His wife tutted. ‘Wait until I’ve got more wine inside of me before you go cracking jokes like that.’ She took a hefty swallow. ‘Hmm. Before I forget: Eden has a theory about the coins.’
    ‘Why there are so many of them? And from different centuries. I must admit that’s a strange one.’
    ‘Eden thinks... ’ A little smile played on Heather’s lips. ‘People put money in the hole where the bones were to appease Humpty’s ghost.’
    ‘No, I didn’t say that.’ Eden flushed.
    ‘As near as. You thought they were offerings.’
    Curtis chuckled. ‘Did you hear that, Humpty?’ He crouched down to look at the bones at eye-level. ‘If you stay there like a good skeleton I’ll bring you a slice of pizza later. What do you say, old chum?’
    ‘Eden - ’ Heather began.
    But Eden had already left the room. They think I’m a fool, she thought angrily. They as good as tell me that I was stupid to bring home an arsonist for a one night stand. Now I’ve tried to show an interest in Heather’s bloody bones they’re making fun of me.
    In the gloomy passageway she mistook one door for the way back to the living room. She miscalculated the height of the entrance; a second later