hear her correctly? I’m pregnant?
What. The. Fuck?
“I take it you didn’t know yet,” Dr. Fallon presumes. Correctly.
When I look at her, my bottom jaw is still on the floor, my heart is beating erratically, and my head just slowly moves from side to side of it’s own accord. My hands draw together in my lap, my fingers wringing each other relentlessly as I try to calm my heart.
“When was your last period? How many weeks ago? You can hold up fingers if you need to,” she instructs.
“Calendar?” I whisper and she hands me her phone after pulling up the calendar app on it. I scroll back through the dates, counting back and trying to remember when it was. I point to the week and realize it was just over six weeks ago, right before the time when my whole life fell apart.
Holding my throat for support, I whisper to her, “Lighter than usual.”
“Are you on the pill?”
“No. Implant,” I whisper and point to my arm. My short answers will have to work for now or I’ll have to start writing out the answers. My anxiety is making my throat constrict even more than before and even whispering is becoming more difficult.
The knowing look on her face concerns me. “Are you sure the implant didn’t come out on its own? Did you doctor specifically feel for it and tell you it was in place?”
I think back and try to remember the specifics of that day. “No,” I whisper. He simply gave me an injection to deaden the area, made a small incision to insert it, and walked out of the room when he was finished. He didn’t touch my incision site after he inserted the implant.
She examines my arm, feeling around the area where it should be. She manipulates my arm into different positions as she continues her examination. Her face gives nothing away but I think I’ve been holding my breath the entire time. What is she going to tell me?
“There’s no implant in your arm, Sophia,” Dr. Fallon explains. “The implant is small and has to be placed in a specific location for the best benefits. Your doctor should have felt of the site immediately afterward and ensured it had been inserted correctly. I don’t feel it anywhere in your arm, which leads me to believe it was either never fully inserted or it fell out immediately after the procedure.”
Sitting in stunned silence, the only recurring thought I have is that Dom will never believe me. He’ll think I lied about the whole thing just to trap him with a pregnancy. My anxiety is increasing by the moment.
Dr. Fallon makes some notations in my chart before returning her gaze to me. “Based on this information, you are somewhere between four to eight weeks pregnant, but I’m leaning more to the six-week timeframe. That’s probably why your menstrual cycle was lighter than usual during that time. Your obstetrician will be able to pinpoint a more exact time with an ultrasound.
“As far as everything else, you’re very fortunate that it’s soft tissue damage only. That takes a while to heal, too, but you’ll fully heal without a problem. You won’t feel like working for the next couple of weeks so I’ll give you a doctor’s excuse. Is there anything else you need?”
Yes, but you can’t help me with that, doc .
Shaking my head ‘no,’ I whisper, “Thank you.”
“It’ll take a little while for the discharge papers to be finished. Do you have a ride home?” she asks and then looks at the door to my room.
“Don’t tell him!” I whisper urgently to her as my swollen eyes dart between her and the door.
“I won’t, and I’ll tell the nurses to make sure to keep it quiet, too, when they review your discharge instructions,” she assures me as she walks to the door. Stopping, she faces me, suddenly suspicious, “Did he do this to you?”
I aggressively shake my head from side to side and instantly regret it. “No. Saved me.”
Her demeanor softens as she considers my words.