Hamsikker 2 Read Online Free PDF Page B

unsure if Erik was just waiting to argue, waiting to pull him up and castigate him for cold-blooded murder. “I’m not proud of what I did, you know. I still see Cliff in my dreams. I can picture myself kneeling over him, pounding my fists into his face over and over and over. I see his eyes closing and his nose breaking. I can feel his teeth rattling in his head, and the feel of his skull as it smacked back against the concrete.”
    There were so many things Jonas wished he could change, but he couldn’t. He wished he had bought the velvet-lined coffin for his father. He was starting to realize that, starting to accept that he couldn’t control everything. After Cliff had died, he had wanted to take charge of everything. He’d lost his mind for a while there, and now that he was back he was determined not to mess up again. The only way he could start afresh was to be honest, with not just the others, but himself too.
    “I don’t think I could do that again,” said Jonas. “Killing a man is easy in that second right before you pull the trigger. It’s the easiest thing in the world, but afterwards? There’s no law now. There’s no clear path anymore. What is justice these days? Without Dakota, I…”
    Erik pulled a slim piece of licorice out of his pocket and examined it. “This is my last one. I was trying to save it, but seems like I may as well light it up now.” He tugged at the end and plucked a piece off. As he chewed on it, he offered a piece to Jonas.
    “No, thanks.”
    “Right and wrong? That’ll depend on who you ask. Pippa and I chose a path a few years back. We follow Him and are thankful that we have Him to guide us. We have our prayers, our children, and that is all. I can’t say if you should do the same, that’s up to you, man, but it works for us. As for Cliff – forget about it. I don’t see the need to spill any tears over him, and I sure don’t see the need to tell anyone else about this. We’ve all seen and done some crazy shit. I’d never let anyone get in the way of getting my family to safety, and I know you’re the same, Hamsikker. If you hadn’t stopped Cliff who’s to say where it would’ve ended? With him getting more of us killed, probably. What’s done is done.”
    Jonas leant back and looked out at the golf course illuminated by the dim light. It was serene and quiet, a world away from what lay beyond the fences. “I could do with a cigarette.”
    Erik laughed. What started out as a chuckle developed into a full-blown belly laugh. Jonas watched on, bemused, as Erik finally regained control of himself.
    “I tried going cold turkey a few years back. It didn’t go so well. I was a pain in the ass, and I was horrible to Pippa, just horrible. I hated myself, but we got through it.”
    Jonas looked at Erik as he took a bite of licorice.
    “It tastes like ripe tar on a hot day,” said Erik grimacing. “It’s foul, absolutely no doubt about it, foul.”
    “Didn’t you develop a taste for it?” asked Jonas.
    “Are you kidding, Hamsikker? I’d rather chew on Cliff’s bloody bones right now, but it’s all I got. I don’t miss the cigarettes anymore, and I ain’t going back. I’ll be pleased when this last one is finished. Then I’m clean.”
    “You’re certifiable, Lansky.” Jonas remembered how he had left his father, and his mind presented an image of his father spread out on the stone floor with his brains splattered everywhere. Jonas and Dakota had run out of the church listening to Mrs. Danick shooting the place up. If Erik hadn’t stopped then to pick them up, where would they be now? A long time dead, probably. He owed Erik. They had saved each other countless times since then, but he would never forget that. Erik could’ve driven away. He had his own family to take care of, but he had still stopped to make sure Jonas and Dakota were okay.
    “I’m certifiable?” Erik sighed and shivered. “You’re in a fit of rage, about to kill a man, and you